By Debbie Schlussel
Read the touching op-ed piece on giving loved ones “what they need,” in today’s USA Today by my friend, Capt. James Key, chaplain in the U.S. Army at Fort Irwin, California.
Here are some excerpts:

In 1975, my paternal grandma, Helen McClain, mailed my Christmas gift as she always did. I was expecting a new Hot Wheels track that year, but when I opened the small box on Christmas morning, I quickly realized that she hadn’t granted my wish. Instead, I found a children’s version of the Holy Bible. . . .

Capt. James Key, U.S. Army Chaplain

For years, this gift didn’t make much sense to me. More than 30 years later, however, I understand Grandma’s rationale. Instead of giving me what I wanted, she gave me what I needed. During some of my most difficult days in Iraq, I found comfort in the word of God. Grandma died of cancer in 1987, but her timeless gift and words remain in my heart and mind today.
As a society, we often spend too much time trying to give our loved ones what they want. This holiday season, video game systems such as PlayStation 3 and Nintendo Wii have created long lines and short tempers at stores. Many adults will spend hundreds of dollars on these systems. Others have gone a step further, bidding thousands of dollars on eBay to ensure that their child won’t be disappointed on Christmas Day.
My 9-year-old son has told me he wants a PlayStation 3, too. He may or may not get one, but I know what he will get: a children’s version of the Bible. I hope when he grows older and experiences some of the vicissitudes of life, he too will find strength and comfort in this eternal book, as I have. . . .
So what unforgettable gifts will you give people this year? Before you scour the shopping malls and spend hours searching online for that perfect gift, ask yourself: Will it be what they want or what they need? Whatever it is – whether sacred, simple or even frivolous – I hope that the gifts you give loved ones will remain unforgettable in their hearts and minds.

AMEN.
Read Capt. Key’s other inspiring piece from this past Memorial Day.

By Debbie Schlussel
HAMAS v. Fatah . . . (Well, it probably will last forever, since this is the gazillionth incarnation of it).

Donald v. Rosie . . .

By Debbie Schlussel
AP reports that way too many people are taking the “Seinfeld” concept of “Festivus” seriously. (Festivus is a non-descript, secular replacement for Christmas and Chanukah, celebrated by George Costanza’s father, Frank.)

In fact, so many people are celebrating this stupid, fictional holiday that the Milwaukee-based Wagner copmany is briskly selling its line of Festivus poles, this holiday season.

Just remember, these fools are celebrating a fake holiday from a television comedy, with what amounts to a stripper pole. Nice. “Festivus for the Rest of Us”? I don’t think so.

Sad: Festivus Poles Doing Brisk Business

By Debbie Schlussel
Last year, around this time, journalist lite Baba Wawa had a vapid 2-hour special on “Heaven: Where is it? How do we Get There?” Unfortunately, as you start your Christmas Weekend tonight, it’s baaaaack. The absurdity of this Barbara Walters “Special” is like a bad bean dip. It keeps repeating. And it stinks.
Among her religion “experts” on this show, Richard Gere, Maria Shriver, and author Mitch Albom. Huh? Being married to the “Terminator”/Bad Governator doesn’t qualify you to know more about Heaven than anyone else. But being part of the Kennedy clan does make one more qualified to speak of Hell on Earth than others.
And it’s an excuse to promote Islam above all other religions, just in time for Christmas. And to tell us the virtues of becoming a HAMAS homicide bomber: Their after-life sex-life is better than yours, you sexless Christians.

Baba Wawa & Dr. Death, Jack Kevorkian
From my post on this insipid pop “journalism” Walters’ special, last year:

In previewing her ABC News special on Heaven, airing next week, Walters says, “There were things that . . . amused me like the whole business of the 72 virgins who are created for men.” Barbara Walters is “amused” by men who murder thousands of innocent people? Time to put her out to pasture.
Even the editors of LHJ were apparently taken aback. They had to insert an editor’s note explaining that these were suicide bombers with whom Walters is “amused.” I’m sure the victims of these bombers aren’t amused, but most of them aren’t around to talk about it on Walters’ insipid “news” specials.
Walters then makes the false comparison of Christianity as a sexless religion (not true) to the 72 virgins in heaven for Islam. Huh? She seems to forget that there’s that little step of mass murder before Heaven. “And in the Christian religion, the idea is to have a pure life that’s happy and content without sex. According to Islam expert Imam Feisal Abdul Rauf, sex for Muslims is part of the joy of heaven.”
I’m sure there are plenty of Christians who’d beg to differ with the Reverend Barbara Walters’ false portrayal of their religion, which believes in the Biblical commandment, “Be fruitful and multiply,” as much as any Abrahamic religion.

Dear Santa:
For Christmas, please bring us the gift of no more stupid Barbara Walters specials.
Thanks,
America

By Debbie Schlussel
Our friends at the falsely-named Transportation Security Administration have yet another silly restriction on liquids–another stupid regulatory requirement that won’t stop a bomb from getting on your flight. We’ve written about the previous, absurd liquid rules here and here.
It’s official:

“Snow globes and like decorations regardless of size or amount of liquid inside.”

(Christmas Snow Globes from Western Silver)
This is apparently an exception to the “3-ounce containers of liquid in a 1-quart bag” rule. Three ounces, one quart, no snow globes. The whole thing makes no sense. The fact is that a bomb can still be made with the three ounce containers, and that you can buy a bigger container of liquid at the shops inside the airport. You can probably even buy snow globes, there.

None of this will stop terrorists from getting onto flights and having their way. The only way we’ll ever stop them is if we get over the snow-globe-and-other-liquids-hysteria and start profiling.
That’s what the Israelis do. And guess what? A terrorist has never succeeded in bringing down El Al flights, snow globe or not.

By Debbie Schlussel
I always get a great laugh when I get e-mails like this preaching “tolerance” to me. The best part is about her claim that “christians and jews who are out there bombing poor palestinian children.” Her timing is a little poor for that claim, given the ongoing Alien-Versus-Predator killling of each other and their children going on right now between Islamist HAMAS and Fatah terrorists in the Palestinian Authority. Apparently, when she’s off her medication, Jules doesn’t read a paper.

— julie gold ju12345us@yahoo.com wrote:
Date: Fri, 22 Dec 2006 07:24:39 -0800 (PST)
From: julie gold ju12345us@yahoo.com
Subject: you racist bitch and cunt
To: dschlussel@yahoo.com
“Thank you for spending valuable seconds, minutes, etc. of your life on Debbie. She appreciates your obsession, but rest assured it is, very likely, not mutual.” [DS: This statement appears in the “Contact” section of this site.]
wtf [DS:”What the F-ck”]– we write hate mail not because we like you, but because we want you to read our hatred for you you nasty racist piece of shit bitch and cunt!!! how dare you criticize only muslims how about christians and jews who are out there bombing poor palestinian children and taking away their land you dirty whore!!!
someone ought to smake [sic] you in the face and realize this is the 21st century where we ought to be tolerant of other peoples’ cultures and beliefs – how dare you criticize obama’s name and beliefs – people are entitled to their opinions you cunt!!!
rot in hell you bitch – no body [sic] except a few losers and bigoted dopes like you wants to listen to you!!

Hmmm . . . Like the loser, named Julie Gold, who just spent a whole lot of energy on me?! Believe me, Jules, there are more than a few of those–your camp is, unfortunately, enormous. But still not as big as the daily group of readers and fans who e-mail me with more sober–and stable thoughts.
Happy Holidays. And may Santa bring you some extra Prozac . . . or Paxil.

By Debbie Schlussel
Hey, Guys, remember that store, “Best Buy,” where you used to buy your electronic gadgets? Well, you’re no longer welcome.
After reading today’s USA Today article on the feminization of Best Buy, perhaps a name change is in order: Breast Buy. Men, you are out–and uteruses (uteri?)–are in at the mass-retailer.
Read these excerpts. Best Buy looking for sales associates from Victoria’s Secret? Low, soft music? Affirmative action for female hiring and promotions? Huh? Is this an electronics store or the set of ABC yenta-fest “The View”?:

Best Buy Now = Breast Buy; Guys Not Wanted

“We were a boy’s toy store designed for boys by boys,” says Julie Gilbert, vice president of Best Buy.
Well, no more. The “feminization” of the consumer electronics business is underway.
Instead of hitting high-tech hysteria at Best Buy (BBY) this holiday season, shoppers may notice a softer, more personal atmosphere. Music is quieter. Lights are lower. Salespeople talk to customers about their lifestyles . . . .
Aisles have been widened so baby strollers fit through easily. And more stores are displaying little living rooms with wide-screen TVs and surround-sound speakers to show customers what the equipment will look like in their homes.
Women now influence 90% of consumer electronics purchases, from the type and look of the big-screen TV to the color of the iPod speakers for the living room, Best Buy says. The Consumer Electronics Association estimates their influence is less, but still significant and growing. It says women influence 57% of purchases, or $80 billion of the $140 billion spent on consumer electronics this year. . . .
“Women likely will notice and appreciate some of the changes more.”
About four years ago Best Buy realized that women were warming up to technology. . . .
Overnight, it seemed, consumer electronics became a design element. . . . “The products we sell and the services we sell are about trends and fashion.”
Best Buy executives started focusing on feedback from female shoppers, and it wasn’t good. Many women felt that the sales staff – the “Blue Shirts” that tended to be young men – were dismissive.
“Women couldn’t get anyone to help them,” Gilbert says. “They weren’t treated with respect.”

This constant whine from women is total BS. I’ve never had a problem getting anyone–at Best Buy (er . . . Breast Buy) or elsewhere–to take my money. Puh-leeze. Some of these women want a psychologist or hairdresser, not someone who’s selling them an IPod.

So in 2002, the company embarked on an ambitious “customer-centric” plan that started out with four distinct personalities for its stores to focus on. It gave the personalities names like Barry (an affluent tech enthusiast); Jill (a busy suburban mom); Buzz (a young gadget fiend) and Ray (a price-conscious family guy).
In 2005, 40% of 300 stores it redecorated were aimed at Barry, with a separate home-theater department and specialists in mobile electronics. Jill stores had personal shopping assistants for busy moms. Buzz stores had lots of video games, and Ray stores focused on low prices. Some stores had two or more personas going at once.
“We’ve evolved since then,” says spokeswoman Dawn Bryant. . . .
Eventually, all of its nearly 750 U.S. stores will be revamped with a softer, more user-friendly decor and more personalized services, basically the Jill model. Some stores have been completely redesigned, while others have undergone only small changes so far. . . .

New Best Buy Slogan?

Best Buy decided to expand the number of stores with Magnolia displays from 127 to 300 this year. And they included more lower-priced TV systems in the displays, too.
“Women are drawn to flat-panel TVs,” Gilbert says. “They want that big, clunky TV out of the living room.”
To lure more female shoppers, Best Buy also is changing its workforce. . . .
The company is pushing to add more female Blue Shirts and store general managers. About 25% of its U.S. employees are women. Though that percentage hasn’t changed, the total number of employees has risen, so more women are employed at Best Buy.
The company also is beginning to promote more women. Since January, it has increased the number of female store general managers by 4% and the number of women in training to be general managers by 4%. It has doubled the number of women working in home theater departments in the past four months, it says. . . .
“Women consumers are seeing a lot more women in our stores, and that makes it less frightening and less intimidating,” says Anna Gallina, general manager of Best Buy’s North Palm Beach, Fla., store, which has 40% female employees. [DS: Huh? I’ve never been “frightened” or “intimidated” shopping at Best Buy. What are these conniptive, hysterical women talking about?!] She says she’s seen big changes in the company since she joined 10 years ago as assistant manager of a store in Miami. . . .
To find more female employees, the company has started recruiting not just from electronics competitors – such as Wal-Mart, Target and Circuit City – but from other types of retailers. “We’re recruiting from Nordstrom’s, Victoria’s Secret, Origins or other stores where women love to shop,” Bryant says. “We can teach them about consumer electronics. But we want them to understand and be excited about women’s lifestyles.”
Gilbert, who has helped direct the feminization of Best Buy, also leads 22 groups of about 25 female employees each who meet once a month. The women are from all ranks of the company, and the groups’ goals are to build leadership skills, network and push innovation through the company. The so-called wolf packs are part of a strategy to train, support and promote women within Best Buy.
Their goal is for 50% of the workforce to be women, including one day the CEO, says Gilbert, whose title is vice president of Women’s Leadership Forum (WoLF) and Entrepreneurial Initiatives.
“We’re working with the Girl Scouts, with private female colleges and others to recruit amazing women so we can delight our women customers,” Gilbert says. “Imagine opening your front door, and it’s a woman on the Geek Squad.” . . .
“We’re not going to paint the stores pink.”

Thank Heaven for small favors.

By Debbie Schlussel
Today, I’ll be doing these shows:
* 3:05 p.m. Eastern/12:05 Pacific: “The Ron Reagan Show“, on KIRO-AM 710, Seattle. Listen Live.
* 5:30 p.m. Eastern: “Henican & White” on WOR-AM 710, New York City. Listen Live.

By Debbie Schlussel
Most press reports about the at LAX’s airport security checkpoint brand this “an innocent mistake” as did airport official Paul Haney. Or they branded her “an inexperienced traveler.”grandmother who put her 1-month-old grandson through the X-Ray machine
But this was neither a mistake nor did it have anything to do with inexperience. It had to do with one thing–the grandmother DOES NOT SPEAK ENGLISH. She chose not to learn English deliberately and, therefore, endangered her grandson.
One wonders if she was even an American citizen or here legally. If only reporters had the diligence or interest to check her status. Predictably, they did not.

By Debbie Schlussel
That’s the question asked in USA Today by liberal former Johnson Administration employee Jack Valenti, who also formerly headed the Motion Picture Association of America. He flew 51 combat missions in WWII as a pilot commander of a B-25 twin-engine attack bomber with the 12th Air Force in Europe.
Answer: NO, the next generation does not value the sacrifice of war. And neither does the current one. That’s why we are losing.
Still, Valenti’s piece is a good one, worthy of a complete read. Here’s what he relayed to his own son:

Perhaps some parents might want to do what I did years ago. When my son was about 14, I took him to Omaha Beach and the Normandy American Cemetery and Memorial in France. We stood on the bluff above the beach in the same spot where Nazi troops had dug in. They had poured rifle, mortar and machine gunfire onto the U.S. troops clambering out of their landing crafts. They cut them down on the sand and in the water that seemed to still run red with the blood flowing so wantonly on that invasion day, June 6, 1944.
My son was struck with how close it was from the bluff to the beach. I said, “John it was very close, but remember those young boys never turned back, not one of them. They never turned back. They kept coming.”
Then we walked a short distance to the American Cemetery. It is on land a grateful France granted to the United States for use in perpetuity. The Stars and Stripes flies over this cathedral of the dead. We turned our gaze to the grave markers, row upon row upon row, as far as the eye could see. There, I told my son, were buried 9,387 young men, many of whom were in between the ages of 18 and their early 20s, “just a few years older than you are right now,” I said.
We walked among the markers laid out in serried ranks. I asked my son to read the inscriptions on those grave markers, the bland finalities of a young warrior’s life – name, rank, outfit and the day he died ‚Äî lives ended before they could be lived.
Finally, I stopped and looked full face at my son. “John, I want you to know why I brought you here.” He looked puzzled. I said, “I wanted you to understand that these boys, who never knew you, nonetheless gave you the greatest gift one human can give another. They gave you the gift of freedom. They bought and paid for that gift in blood and bravery. They made it possible for you and millions like you to never have to test your own courage to see how you would react when the dagger is at the nation’s belly and death stares you right in the face. You owe them a debt you will never be able to repay.”

AMEN.