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By Debbie Schlussel
I sorta, kinda like Will Farrell and always hope to like his comedies. But, usually, I’m sadly let down.
Just got back from screening his much hyped, “Semi-Pro,” which comes out late this month. And, while I won’t post my complete review until closer to its release, let’s just say, this one was no exception. It’s SOOOOO bad, it’s awful. There are moments of lucid detectable humor. But mostly, it’s just bad. It’s crap. In one word: OY.
Please G-d, give me back that 1.5 hours I just wasted. More evidence that anything can be greenlit in Hollywood, so long as it has the right name on the marquis–in this case, Will Farrell.
White men can jump. But, in this case, they–along with quite a few Black men (and women)–can jump at the chance to make more silver screen trash.
“Slapshot,” it ain’t.
By Debbie Schlussel
Well, we already knew it, but now there’s confirmation: Muslims are the new Nazis of Europe. They are responsible for at least 50% (and probably far more) of the anti-Semitic hate crimes in Europe. Don’t be shocked if that number gets mirrored here (the FBI refuses to keep publicly-released statistics on the heritage of hate-crime perpetrators here–gee, I wonder why; might get in the way of their “outreach” to extremist Muslims):
Some 50 percent of anti-Semitic incidents on the European continent are connected to radical Islamic elements, according to a senior European Commission official.
A photo provided by police shows the words “Jew out” in German, smeared on a gravestone at a Jewish cemetery in Czestochowa, Poland, Monday.
The figure comes from European Commissioner for Justice, Freedom and Security Franco Frattini, who is responsible in the EU for combating racism and anti-Semitism in Europe. Frattini mentioned it in a conversation with Minister for Diaspora Affairs Isaac Herzog last week, and said it was based on European Union reports.
Frattini was in Israel last week for the Second European Union-Israel Seminar for Combating Racism and Anti-Semitism at the Foreign Ministry in Jerusalem.
Herzog, who is responsible for coordinating government activities in combating anti-Semitism at the cabinet level, told The Jerusalem Post that it was “not new that Frattini relates a large percentage of anti-Semitic incidents to radical Islam.”
Of course, the EU official was sure to point out that this is “radical Islam,” not “Islam,” itself. And the distinction between the two is . . . ?
Get a clue. It’s Islam. Period.
FBI Bungles Case of Smiling “Just Fireworks” Terrorists
The FBI says two Egyptian college students arrested near the Navy weapons station at Goose Creek, South Carolina, last year were carrying low-grade fireworks as they claimed.
The FBI says the University of South Florida engineering students were not carrying dangerous explosives.
Twenty-six-year-old Ahmed Abdellatif Sherif Mohamed and 21-year-old Youssef Samir Megahed have been in jail since sheriff’s deputies found what they called bomb-making materials in their car during a traffic stop.
They were indicted on federal charges of transporting explosives illegally.
But an FBI report submitted to the court Wednesday in Tampa, Florida, by Megahed’s public defender says the items explode in tests.
U.S. attorney’s office spokesman Steve Cole would not talk about the filing Thursday.
I think we all know–as the prosecutors know–that these two were not only carrying pipe bombs, but they lied about what they were doing and gave a million different stories. We also know that they went to shooting ranges, were tied to another Muslim, Karim Moussaoui, who was engaged in a sham marriage and violated his student visa, and made videos posted on the internet on how to rig electronic toys as bombs.
Just fireworks? Maybe the FBI thinks so. But real law enforcement personnel–ie., those concerned about enforcing the law and protecting the public more than outreaching to Muslims–know otherwise.
These guys are terrorists, and their cargo when they were caught in the middle of the night on August 4, 2007, was not “just fireworks.”
Thank the Keystone Kops at the FBI, if this case goes down the drain, and these terrorists go free.
By Debbie Schlussel
Now that the Superbowl is over, here are my observations:
* A funny thing happened on the way to the coronation. Contrary to the conventional wisdom and foregone conclusions, there was no President Dewey and no New England Patriots victory, tonight. I’m glad the New York Giants won. As I wrote earlier today, I was sick and tired of the coronation of the Patriots and Tom Brady. Glad a classier bunch took the crown out from under them. Congrats to Eli Manning et al. Question: Do Eli and Peyton Manning make the first brother QB team to win Superbowl championships? I’d bet yes.
Here’s my fave picture from the night:
NY Giant Michael Strahan Tackles Pats QB Tom Brady
* YAAAWN. The Superbowl was incredibly boring and tiresome until the last couple of minutes or so of the Fourth Quarter. It was a low scoring game with almost nothing going on. NY Giant Plaxico Burress helped make it exciting, catching Eli Manning’s 13-yard pass for the touchdown that clinched the victory. Tom Brady looked like he was weighed down by too much mousse and gel. So sad, too bad. You lost, dude. Maybe if Brady (and his posse) concentrated more on football and less on his modeling career and wannabe future as a Hollywood starlet, he’d have been the four-ring champ. The real men in flak-jackets on the field won this one. Yes, Girls Can Play in the NFL . . .
Tom Brady:
NFL’s Supermodel Not So Super
* The ads were among the lamest and most uncreative of any Superbowl yet. It seems that with each successive Superbowl, the ads get worse. It’s a sure sign of the declining creativity in America (which some economists say is a sign of the decline of capitalism and freedom, too). You’d think that at $2.7 mill per 30 seconds, the ads would be spectacular. NOT. If I had to pick a favorite ad, it was this one from Coke (and no, it’s not the lame James Carville Coke ad. Groan.):
Eli Manning, Burress Catches Manning’s 13-Yard Pass For Touchdown
By Debbie Schlussel
I am rooting for the New York Giants in today’s Supe (I don’t want the NFL to sue me for using the word “Superbowl”–more on that below). I’m rooting for them against the almost coronated New England Patriots for several reasons:
* I generally like the underdog.
* I’m sick of the coronation hype surrounding the Pats. It’s almost like, why have the game? They’ve already won in the MSM’s minds.
* Tom Brady and the Patriots have won the Supe enough times. Give someone else a chance. Tired of him and them. Three rings is enough. The fourth one for Brady should have been a wedding ring for the mother of his kid.
And I don’t want them to break the Dolphins undefeated record, as much as I also don’t like that Bob Griese dude much (though I do like Larry Csonka and Mercury Morris). Even if the record is broken, it’s not like the Dolphins spied to be undefeated. Attention, Bill Belicheater.
* As I’ve noted before, Pats coach, Bill Belichick, dresses like the Unabomber. Sartorial anti-splendor. . .
Fashion by the Unabomber: New England Patriots’ Bill Belichick
* Tired of all the Tom Brady hype. As you know, he’s the DebbieSchlussel.com 2007 Woman of the Year. He walked away from his out-of-wedlock kid and is anything but a role model. Yet, you rarely hear about that. Instead, you hear endless annoying stories about him and his latest supermodel girlfriend, Giselle Bundchen. Endless stories about his walking cast boot. Endless stories about him. And I’m sick of him. Enough of the pretty boy (who is a liberal Democrat–Eli Manning, QB of the Giants is a conservative Republican; how many babies has he fathered and walked away from? I’ll bet none–he’s got class).
Woman of the Year, Tom Brady:
Shallowest Puddle on the Supe Sidewalk
Enough of Tom Brady in girlie-manish Stetson cologne ads. Enough of stories about the $1 million standing offer for him to model underwear. Enough stories about how he’s going to be the next Hollywood action star a la Arnold Schwarzenegger. This is a guy who uses more moisturizer and gel than most women. No thanks.
Hey, if the Pats do win and Brady is the game MVP, look for him to do the “I’m going to Disney World” commercial. But don’t look for him to take the kid he abandoned with him.
Who are you rooting for and why? What are your predictions. The Pats are heavily favored to win by more than 10 points.
Other Supe stories of interest and importance:
* Three cheers for Tom Petty, the halftime performer along with his Heartbreakers. Hillary Rodham Cankles Clinton used his, “American Girl,” as her New Hampshire Democratic Primary theme song. He was asked whether he favors her for the White House. His response–the rest of Hollywood take note:
We’re not endorsing anyone. You wouldn’t want to take a guitar player’s advice on something like that.
Amen, brother. Unlike 99% of the rest, no need to tell him to shut up and sing. He gets it.
* Since you’ll likely be ingesting a lot of chips and dip during your Supe viewing, remember the “Seinfeld” episode, in which George Costanza got caught double-dipping? (Video below.)
Not only is it a no-no, but researchers at Clemson studied the effects of double-dipping–putting your chip, pretzel, veggie, etc. back into the dip after you took a bite–and found it’s even more disgusting than you thought. Three to six double dips transferred about 10,000 bacteria from an eater’s mouth to the remaining dip sample. YUCK!!!
* Look for the original Serpenthead (as opposed to Michael “Serpenthead” Chertoff), James Carville, to annoy you in a Coke Superbowl ad. He and Republican former Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist play a game of jinx and play nice over a bottle of Coke. Get it?–“Jinx, Buy Me a Coke.”
Here’s the ad. Um, not funny:
And, sadly, this has been touted by the MSM as one of the “better” Supe ads. Just how much did ad agency Wieden+Kennedy get paid for this lame ad? Cha-groan-ching.
* Churches are under fire from the NFL copyright police for showing the Superbowl and even using the name of the game in any Church flyers. Yup, the No Fun League strikes again against the Christian religion. The NFL says that not only can churches not use the name “Superbowl” to advertise Big Game parties, tonight, but churches cannot:
* Show the game on anything larger than a 55 inch screen.
* Show the game to a large gathering.
* Have any religious message delivered at halftime or anywhere throughout to party attendees.
Etc., etc., etc., ad absurdum. The League has sued churches who throw parties. Disgusting.
I’m all for protecting copyrights and intellectual property, but this is ridiculous. The NFL allows bars and restaurants to violate all these rules, but not churches. Wondering how many mosques the NFL has sued. Oh, yeah, they don’t like the Supe–no pigskin.
Also, the Superbowl is broadcast over public airwaves. If they want to restrict who shows it, they should show it on pay per view or the NFL network. But they don’t. It’s on FOX (and rotates among ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX). We own the public airwaves, not the League. I don’t believe their restrictions would hold up in court. But it takes a church with the deep pockets to take it all the way to the other Supe–the Supreme Court.
Kudos to former NFLer and conservative Democrat Congressman Heath Shuler, who announced plans to intro legislation to exempt churches from the absurd NFL police.
Congressman Heath Shuler: Telling the NFL to Stop Suing Churches
Clearly, the NFL has it in for Christianity. Remember all the fines for Jon Kitna when he wears a cap bearing a cross?
Read more about “G-d vs. Gridiron“.
* And while we’re on the topic of NFL police, a couple of years ago, when the Supe was in miserable Detroit, I wrote about how your immigration enforcement dollars were “at work”: Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) agents were busy harassing entrepreneurs on behalf of the NFL and seizing merchandise. Some of that which was seized did not even bear copyrighted material, words or designs.
Well, all of that absurdity continues with this Superbowl. ICE agents in Phoenix are all over the game, seizing that serious terrorist threat known as T-shirts and baseball caps.
If–as The ICE Princess, Julie L. Myers, claims–ICE is so strapped for cash, why the heck do ICE agents continue to act as the tax-paid private police for NFL copyright enforcement? It has ZERO nexxus to ICE’s mission. You immigration and customs enforcement tax dollars at work.
BTW, don’t be surprised if your $$$ are footing the bill for Julie Myers and her hubby to attend the big game in balmy Phoenix, all in the name of this important endeavor.
If you are an illegal alien, today (and the past week) were good times to sneak into the U.S. via Arizona. All the ICE agents are busy working for the billionaire owners and multi-millionaire players in the NFL, protecting their private interests, not yours.
ICE Michigan/Ohio Special Agent in Charge Brian Moskowitz a/k/a “Abu Moskowitz”: “Enforces” Immigration Laws at Superbowl XL in Detroit
By Debbie Schlussel
If you are a Van Halen fan, as I am (minus Wolfie–bring back Michael Anthony!)–and even if you are not–you will find these David Lee Roth solo vocal tracks, below, from the original studio recording of “Running With the Devil” (one of my fave Van Halen songs–I work out to it), hilarious. It’s amazing what the absence of Michael Anthony’s background vocals does.
The screams, especially just after the 2:30 mark and from the 3:00 mark until the end, are funny (and painful). It’s amazing how high and loud he screamed. Oy. Some smart aleck (with a great sense of humor) at Van Halen’s record company released these.
For the record, I’ve always sort of liked the nutty DLR because, like me, he is the kid of a Jewish ophthalmologist (mine did not bankroll a rock band, though, and didn’t have any kids who could sing; nor, perhaps, did DLR’s). He is one of the few Jews with two first names. You rarely hear of a Mary-Kate Horowitz or Mary Pat Cohen. Just not in our culture.
Exit question: What would Simon and Randy say about these vocals? Well, it’s safe to say he would not be going to Hollywood. Glad “AI” wasn’t around then.
Thanks to my friends Marc Fellhauer and Mike Wolters of Drew & Mike for the tip.
By Debbie Schlussel
Are you surprised the Muslims forced two mentally disabled women to become homicide bombers in Baghdad markets, today?
You shouldn’t be. It’s not the first time, and it’s a good bet it probably won’t be the last. Just a few years ago, the Palestinians sent a mentally disabled boy to be a homicide bomber at an Israeli army checkpoint. The soldiers used an armed robot to disarm him.
Unfortunately, not the case, today, as the two women were blown to bits by remote control. America calls the people that sent them “demonic.” I just call ’em what they are: Muslim. Yup, that’s the “Religion of Peace” for you. They keep telling us about these “few” people who’ve “hijacked” their religion. Why is only their religion hijacked in this way and by so many?. Maybe it’s because it’s the religion hijacking them, not the other way around:
Two mentally disabled women were strapped with explosives Friday and sent into busy Baghdad markets, where they were blown up by remote control, a top Iraqi government official said.
Iraqi soldiers secure the scene of a bombing Friday at a popular pet market in central Baghdad.
The bombs killed at least 98 people and wounded more than 200 at two popular pet markets on the holiest day of the week for Muslims, authorities said. In both bombings, the attackers were mentally disabled women whose explosive belts were remotely detonated, Gen. Qasim Atta, spokesman for Baghdad’s security plan, told state television.
Atta said the women were strapped with dynamite and ball bearings, citing members of the bomb squad. The explosives were detonated via cell phone, he said.
An Atta aide said that people referred to the bomber at central Baghdad’s al-Ghazl market as the “crazy woman” and that the bomber at a second market had an unspecified birth disability.
The aide said authorities believe the women were unaware of plans to detonate the explosives.
The nationalities and identities of the women have not been released.
U.S. military officials referred to the two attacks as suicide bombings, saying both women detonated the explosive devices.
The U.S. officials also gave a much lower casualty toll, with 27 civilians dead and 53 others wounded.
The Pentagon attributed the attacks to al Qaeda in Iraq and made no reference to the mental conditions of the women.
“By targeting innocent Iraqis, they show their true demonic character,” said Lt. Col. Steve Stover, spokesman for the Multi-National Division-Baghdad. [DS: Not “demonic.” It’s Islamic.]
“They care nothing for the Iraqi people; they want to subjugate them and forcefully create a greater Islamic sharia state,” he said, referring to Islamic law. [DS: Um, isn’t the Koran the supreme law, according to Iraq’s constitution. Hello . . .? It already is a sharia state.]
The violence marked the bloodiest series of attacks in Baghdad since August, breaking a brief stretch of relative calm as attacks and deaths dropped after the 2007 increase in U.S. troop strength called the surge.
In Washington, U.S. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice said the attacks show the reality of the continuing struggle against militants, adding that Iraqis have turned against “these terrible, violent people in their midst who will do anything.”
“It certainly underscores and affirms the decision of the Iraqi people that there is no political program here that is acceptable to a civilized society [DS: Um, who says it’s a “civilized society”?], and that this is the most brutal and the most bankrupt of movements [DS: Islam] that would do this kind of thing,” she said at a press briefing. . . .
The first bomb blew up at al-Ghazl animal market around 10:30 a.m., killing 69 and wounding more than 140. The second blast happened about a half-hour later in the New Baghdad neighborhood pet market, killing 29 people and wounding 67.
Time for the FBI, CIA, USDoJ, the White House, and the Pentagon to outreach to this “Religion of Peace” some more. “Islam” means “Peace”? Hilarious. (For the record, “Islam” means “submission.”)
By Debbie Schlussel
Not much new this weekend at the box office. “The Eye,” starring Jessica Alba, an adaptation of a Japanese thriller/horror film, was not screened for critics. That’s usually a strong sign it stinks. I will try to review it for you over the weekend.
* “Over Her Dead Body“: If fart jokes and stupid humor in a lame chick flick is your thing, this is your movie.
Eva Longoria Parker proves that she can play on-screen the exact same character she plays on TV’s “Desperate Housewives.” Oh, the range of this actress who plays a high maintenance bride killed on her wedding day, when she’s crushed by an ice sculpture of an angel. The movie is downhill from there. Her former groom-to-be, Paul Rudd, is lifeless and unfunny, as a humorless, weird man who can’t get over his bitchy former love. We’re not sure why.
Longoria comes back to earth as a ghost, but doesn’t know exactly why or what she’s supposed to do. That’s because she talked over the angel who was trying to give instructions. We’ve been there, seen that before. And we liked it better when Warren Beatty was in it, and it was called, “Heaven Can Wait.”
Longoria Parker’s former fiancee consults a failed psychic (the manly Lake Bell), who doubles as a klutzy caterer. Sound dumb enough yet? Longoria Parker, desperate to keep her fiancee to herself, appears to Bell and tries to separate them. But you know what happens in the end. And all live happily ever after.
Predictable, boring (I fell asleep several times, yet missed nothing), and juvenile. A complete waste of time. Guys–don’t allow your wife/girlfriend to drag you to this. You’ll regret it. Guaranteed.
* “The Rape of Europa“: This fascinating, thorough documentary is based on a book of the same title. It not only details Hitler’s deliberate plundering of art from Jews and whole European countries, but also details his failed ambitions as an artist. A great deal of the art was methodically destroyed, as Hitler felt modern art was tasteless and corrupted the people.
Even if you are a student of the Holocaust and/or World War II, you will learn a lot. Did you know that America went out of its way to save European monuments and art, and put our soldiers in harm’s way to do so? America’s military enlisted artists, “Monuments Men,” to direct soldiers on what to spare and where not to bomb.
While that is similar to the debate about American soldiers and museums in Iraq, with archeological finds that were “damaged” or plundered by Iraqis, I’m of the school that winning a war and saving American soldiers should always be the aim, NOT saving art (which seems to be far more important to the makers of this movie than it is to me).
And we see the fate of famous paintings, like the Mona Lisa. We see how the French went out of their way to save various works from the Louvre and smuggle them into the countryside. We meet the French “art resistance” spies who worked for the Nazis at the Louvre, while they secretly reported back to others the fate of various artworks.
A question not asked in the movie, but which should have been, is why the French cared so much about its art, yet so little about its Jews. Sadly, although this movie is fascinating and interesting, its attitude is that saving art is perhaps more important than saving lives (Jewish or not).
We also see the reactions of Jews as they were forced to work in the Nazi warehouses, as they came upon their families belongings, including photos. The photos were lost, as were the humans behind them who were sent to their deaths. “I lost all of my memories of my family,” remarks one Holocaust survivor in a heartbreaking portion of the movie.
And we see the legal fight over paintings seized by the Nazis or state-run museums from Jewish families. The most fascinating–Gustav Klimt’s beautiful, “Gold Portrait of Frau Bloch-Bauer,” the portrait of Jewish woman Adele Blochbauer, which sat in Austria’s state-run museum, and is the subject of a lawsuit by Blochbauer’s niece, Maria Altmann.
Also interesting was the documentation of the gaudy, garish taste of Nazi Hermann Goering in his art collections.
If you love history, this is well worth seeing. It’s playing mostly at arthouse movie theaters. But you need not like art to like and enjoy it.
By Debbie Schlussel
Today, on ABC’s hag yenta-fest, “The View,” pseudo-“conservative” Elisabeth Hasselbeck said:
I admire her [Hillary] for staying and keeping her family together, not breaking up her family.
Um, is there really anyone who believes that tripe? Is there anyone who really believes that Hillary stayed with the serial-adulterer Slick Willie to keep her family together and not to advance her political career and agenda?
I have some land in Riyadh to sell Ms. Hasselbeck.
Yup, this is what ABC serves up to mindless women as their version of a “conservative.” Airhead extraordinaire.
“View” “Conservative” Airhead Elisabeth Now Taking Deposed Rosie’s Views
By Debbie Schlussel
On Wednesday, a panel of judges on the U.S. Court of Appeals rejected Nazi death camp guard John Demjanjuk’s challenge to a final deportation order from Immigration Court. But, sadly, it’s not the end. This Ukrainian Nazi death camp guard has remained here for decades and will likely die here before he goes to meet Satan. Sadly, he’s had a long, good life as a blue collar worker, had a family, and enjoyed life in the U.S.
I remember when the John Demjanjuk story began. It was the mid-’70s, and I was seven. My Holocaust survivor/entrepreneur grandfather, Isaac, was still alive, and we had hoped this former Nazi guard living in Ohio would go. We not only hoped, we expected it. It was a case my family–most of which had been wiped out in the Holocaust on both sides–followed closely. WE attended meetings and lectures on the subject.
John Demjanjuk:
Just One of Many Nazis Who Gamed the System for a Good Life in America
Nazi Death Camp Guard John Demjanjuk Then (Third From Left)
A decade later, when I was in high school, Demjanjuk was still here, and there were more meetings about him with the Justice Department Office of Special Investigations (in charge of Nazi hunting).
But over two decades later, John Demjanjuk is still here. Demjanjuk, who was believed to be sadistic Treblinka Nazi concentration camp guard “Ivan the Terrible” (and he probably is–alleged “proof” he wasn’t actually proof). Demjanjuk argued that he wasn’t Ivan the Terrible because some of the proof came from the former Soviet Union.
A show trial in Israel, in which the leftist-dominated Israeli Supreme Court wouldn’t let most of the important, conclusive evidence in, resulted in a ruling that he was not Ivan the Terrible, but that he was Ivan the not-as Terrible. He’d been a Nazi death camp guard, if not this Nazi death camp guard. In contrast to the real justice of the Adolf Eichmann trial, the Israelis didn’t even allow evidence in of Demjanjuk’s Nazi tattoo under his arm, common to top Nazi guards. They betrayed Demjanjuk’s victims and let the man free.
Here are the facts:
* In 1977, charges were first brought against Demjanjuk for falsifying applications to enter the U.S. in 1952 and to obtain citizenship in 1958.
* In 1981, his citizenship was revoked. In 1986, he was extradited to Israel for the show trial.
* In 1998, his U.S. citizenship was restored.
* It was revoked again in 2002.
And yet, six years later, Demjanjuk is still here.
Despite the panel ruling from the Court of Appeals, Demjanjuk, now 87, has vowed to appeal to the full Court of Appeals and then to the Supreme Court. Even if he is deported after all that, possibly years from now, he will be in his 90s and have lived a full life. Contrast that with his many victims who never got to live.
And that’s the lesson to all illegal aliens. If even a murderous Nazi death camp guard can remain here while fighting the system for decades, so can they. The fact is–as I’ve written repeatedly on this site–few Nazi death camp guards whom Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) has successfully captured and for whom it has obtained deportation orders–ever get deported.
And that’s not ICE’s fault. It’s the problem with our laws and with the immigration and deportation procedures, mired and bogged down with endless appeals. Those who can’t get travel documents to their former countries, or those who become afflicted with dementia, get to remain here. And ICE can’t hold them in a cell for more than a few months–a lawyer and the courts will get them out. To their credit, ICE Detention and Removal Operations officials overseeing Ohio kept Demjanjuk behind bars as long as legally possible. At least, he got to rot a little.
One of the Nazis about whom I’ve written, Johann Leprich, successfully traveled back-and-forth between Detroit and Canada many times, post-9/11, even though he was a known fugitive. What does that tell you about security and the check for aliens and criminals at those entry points?
The same goes for illegal aliens whose former countries won’t take them or won’t grant them travel docs. The whole system stinks.
Nazis and many unwanted illegal alien criminals get to stay here for decades because our system of getting rid of them is laughable and impotent.
America: Desperate But Not Serious.
***
My friend, Boycott Watch’s Fred Taub, has done a lot of work and research on the Demjanjuk case and was involved in writing an amicus brief in support of his deportation.
Fred has it right. In a great, informative piece, he says, “Call Him Ivan the Terrible.”