By Debbie Schlussel
Though most of you, dear readers, don’t live in the Detroit area or even in Michigan, I think you will enjoy the two April fools that The Detroit Newsistan is serving up, today. This is a taste of the usual drivel Detroit’s more evil of the two lesser major nespapers gives us on a daily basis, but in honor of their fave namesake holiday, they decided to be twice as nice.
* First up is Shikha Dalmia. Dalmia a/k/a S.D. Melzer has two different names and aliases and regularly tries to pretend she’s two different people . . . just like illegal aliens, whom she wants to be able to legally work here through a guest worker program.
Yet, she is upset that Congressmen Heath Shuler and Tom Tancredo are trying to get a house floor vote on the Secure American Through Employment (SAVE) Act, which would require all employers to take part in the electronic verification program that checks the immigration status and work eligibility of all employees seeking work. The purpose is to, once and for all, stop employers from getting away with hiring illegal aliens because the aliens presented fake IDs. Currently, employers only need show that they made copies of two valid IDs from the worker, even if they are fake.
Many of these aliens, just like the dishonest Ms. Dalmia, also try to deceive the rest of us in America, using multiple names and aliases.
When writing op-eds in places like the Wall Street Journal, this woman writes as “S.D. Melzer, a staffer for the Mackinac Public Policy Center” of Michigan. When she writes elsewhere, as with her former employer, The Detroit Newsistan (where she regularly wrote misinformed BS about the “success” of Democracy throughout the Muslim world), she is suddenly “Shikha Dalmia of Metro Detroit, a senior analyst at the Los Angeles-based Reason Foundation.”
To sum up, this woman, like many illegal aliens seeking work here, is employing multiple names and fake personalities to deceive others and put out her silly points of view. But, she can’t, for the life of her, understand, why it’s necessary for us to require employers to verify the real identity of illegal aliens who engage in the same deceptions as Ms. Dalmia in order to obtain jobs that should go to Americans.
Those who publish her work can’t even figure out her real identity, and they’re supposed to be “reporters”–the press who digs into this kind of thing. Yet, employers are supposed to be able to know who is fake, without the e-verify system?
Ms. Dalmia is upset that, under the SAVE Act, “workers–not their employers–would have to clear things with Uncle Sam when their credentials are thrown into question.” Imagine if an employer will actually have to clear up why a woman wanting to write for the employer has two different names and personas. I guess if Dalmia can do it, why not illegal aliens?
* Next is Mekeisha Madden Toby. This woman is The Detroit Newsistan’s sub-rate “TV critic”. Problem is, she’s pretending to be a Detroiter from Los Angeles. She’s one of those people with the group think ethos that “you can’t tell the truth about Detroit.”
She’s miffed that Al Roker and his Spike TV reality show, “DEA,” shows the decrepit Detroit neighborhoods and narrates how Detroit has the highest murder rate in the country and lots of illegal guns on the street. All true. But, this woman who won’t live in Detroit and lives in LOS ANGELES, is mad that the show disses and doesn’t capture the “true” Detroit. And she knows this because she’s experiencing the “real Detroit”. . . in Sunny Los Angeles:

While the narrator spends a great deal of time at the beginning of this Al Roker-produced series telling viewers how dangerous Detroit is, how it has the highest murder rate in the country and how many hundreds of thousands of illegal guns there are on the street, Roker and his producers fail to establish a sense of place. Our Motown is so much more than a list of frightening statistics.

“Our Motown” as written from the beaches of Santa Monica? Puh-leeze. What a fraud.
Happy April Fools Day–which is every day at this “newspaper–from The Detroit Newsistan.