August 6, 2010, - 6:19 pm
It’s a pretty stark sign of how bad a President Barack Obama is when even his royal chief butt-kisser, Jay Leno, is now pulling no punches in his monologue on the guy.
With the arrest of a British female tourist in Dubai for posing its a mall in a bikini, we bring you the following courtesy of Zvi on the Elder Of Ziyon. The events narrated may or may not be true:
We present the tale in three parts.
Part I
The British tourist, now – one can only IMAGINE the Dubai police hunched over their surveillance footage.
The following dramatization is a work of satire. Those who are satirically challenged may want to go read something else.
Chief Dahi Tamim: Can you identify her? I think she may be an Israeli spy.
Policeman #2: Are you sure? he doesn’t seem to be trying to blend in.
Tamim: The Israelis are tricky. She’s hiding by not hiding.
Policeman #3, appreciatively: She’s certainly not hiding much of anything!
Tamim: She’s hiding something. I know she is. You’d better run that clip again.
NormanF on August 6, 2010 at 7:28 pm
Part II:
They run the clip again, watching.
Policeman #4, who is just a bit inexperienced: I think those are communication antenna on her chest.
Policeman #2 whacks him on the head.
Policeman #2: Those are her breasts, you idiot. Try to keep up.
Tamim: You know, he could be right. I wouldn’t put it past her. She’s an Israeli spy, after all. Run that clip again.
They run the clip again, watching.
NormanF on August 6, 2010 at 7:29 pm
Part III:
.. Hours pass.
Tamim: If we can declare her to be a spy, then with this material we’ll get great ratings on CNN.
Policeman #3: But al Jazeera won’t show it.
Tamim: That’s a problem. We want ratings across the board. Play that clip again. There must be something that she’s doing that we can use to justify showing this on al Jazeera. See how she tells off that mall security guard and he backs down. She’s obviously using Joo-Rays to control his mind.
Policeman #3: I don’t think she needs them, but if she has them, her “communication antenna” are emitting them.
He whacks #4 on the head.
Tamim: We’d better bring her into the station.
Policeman #3: Yes, let’s.
Policeman #2: Run that clip again.
NormanF on August 6, 2010 at 7:32 pm
The Conclusion Part I:
Tamim: While you’re at it, bring in that Levantine shopkeeper. He needs to spend less time looking at men’s hot pants. We’ll call him a Zionist agent and expel him to Lebanon.
Policeman #2, watching the video again: The other lady certainly looks mortified.
Policeman #4: How can you tell? She’s wearing the niqab.
Policeman #2: She’s physically assaulting the spy.
Voice: General Tamim, the British Consulate is on the line.
NormanF on August 6, 2010 at 7:34 pm
The Conclusion Part II:
Tamim: Haven’t they finished shining my shoes yet? Tell them that their Consular Assistance has been pretty weak recently. And tell them to send back MY shoes this time. Last time they sent me shoes belonging to whats-his-name, Mabhouh. They had a label that said “made in Israel,” and everything. My own men almost arrested me as a Zionist spy. It was humiliating.
Voice: Yes, sir.
Policeman #3: Sorry about that, sir. It was a mistake anyone could have made.
Tamim: Run that clip again. We may have missed something. Meanwhile, #4, go get both women and bring them in.
#4: What if she uses Joo-rays to control my mind?
#2: You don’t have a mind to control.
He whacks #4 on the head.
Voice: General Tamim, President Ahmadinejad is on the line.
Tamim: Tell him that I’m in an important meeting. I don’t need more “important evidence” from him, thank you. If I want someone who can use Photoshop, I have my own guys. (To #2) Run that clip again.
NormanF on August 6, 2010 at 7:36 pm
The Conclusion Part III:
#5 comes in, watches for a moment. General Tamim! This is a great threat to national decency! She’s eroding the fabric of our society! I’ll go arrest her!
Tamim: No, not you. When you arrested that couple, you embarassed the Emirates.
#5: Please! Can I arrest her just a little bit?
Tamim: Oh, alright. Just a little bit. But bring the other one in too.
#5: Which other one? There are more? (looks paranoid)
Tamim: No, the other one – the one in the niqab.
#5: How will I identify her? There are millions of women wearing the niqab.
Tamim switches camera to X Ray mode.
#2: Wait a minute. The one in the niqab is a man.
LMAO!
NormanF on August 6, 2010 at 7:37 pm
Debbie, I got the feeling that Leno may be a closet conservative after watching his speech at the WH correspondents dinner this year. I think part of the reason that people said he bombed there was that his jokes weren’t PC. The crowd actually booed him when he made fun of MSNBC for being biased towards Obama. Letterman on the other hand needs to be muzzled. Lucky for him he can cloak himself in left wing sentiments so his abusive treatment of women is a nonissue.
A1 on August 7, 2010 at 9:43 pm
I wouldn’t go so far as to call Leno a “closet conservative” but unlike Letterman he has made at least some attempt to be even-handed in his political humor.
Gary Rosen on August 8, 2010 at 2:13 am
Debbie, what do you make of the detention of Donna Shalala by Israeli security? Maybe she went native during her stay?
A1 on August 8, 2010 at 8:45 pm
Lol…this happens when the power declines..This is the decline of Obama power.
hinduidf on August 6, 2010 at 6:55 pm