By Debbie Schlussel

Jennifer Lopez is a huge hypocrite. And she’s tone deaf. Jenny from the block just reminded us why we hate celebrities and wish they would restrict their advice-giving to the images in their mirrors.

Like you, I long ago tired of hearing clueless, vapid celebrities making dumb videos, singing kumbaya songs, and mindlessly uttering jingoistic BS phrases like, “We’re all in this together.” I was especially annoyed by actress Amanda Seyfried screaming, “Stay the f-ck inside” (twice). Um, STFU, dumb former model.

And then there is J-Lo, who lectured her fans to stay home, but didn’t in fact stay home, herself. Fraud.

Not one to allow tragedy and mass deaths around the world and in America get in the way of making a buck, she greedily took to Elle magazine to pimp us on her new shoe line at DSW. In a stunningly, tone-deaf, modern day version of Marie Antoinette’s “Let them eat cake,” she says, “So what if you’re unemployed, broke, and can’t pay your rent. Buy my shoes.” My jaw dropped as I read this:

Everybody’s quarantined and the world is upside-down and crazy. So we’ve gotta make lemonade out of lemons right now, don’t we? We have to find ways to focus and work from home, but also finding things to keep our spirits high. I don’t know anything that makes me happier than shopping for a pair of shoes.

Yeah, if you’re a gazillionaire. For everybody else, a way to pay to keep the lights on and the water running and get toilet paper, would be nice. Whatta bleeping idiot. Doesn’t she watch the damn news? Is she that unaware? A good number of these people are her fans, and she doesn’t even have an iota of a clue about them and how badly they are hurting right now.

As many as a third of Americans (and maybe more) instantly lost their jobs, and because they live paycheck to paycheck, don’t know what they’re going to do to buy food. Even with President Trump’s generous stimulus package, incompetent governors like Michigan’s Gretchen Whitmer have done nothing to fix antiquated unemployment filing systems, and people can’t even get through to file to begin receiving unemployment checks.

By the way, Lopez’s song may tell you love don’t cost a thing, but here’s a tip: her shoes aren’t free.

That’s only the tone-deaf part. Here’s the hypocritical part. . . .

In her Elle interview, she implored everyone to stay at home.

“We’re all stuck at home right now. I am! . . . If you’re healthy and home, it’s a real reset button for so many of us. To be honest, for me, working from home is reading scripts, developing new projects, even working out and learning new dance routines. Because now, you can use the time to prepare. . . . Nobody wanted this to happen, but if it has to be this way, you can take advantage of the time and work to get better. But do that work from home,” she says firmly. “This is such a difficult time for everybody. There are so many people who are sick. We just want to contain it and work from home. Even my kids are working from home and they’re 12!

And for the last week, J-Lo’s been treating us to carefully shot and edited videos of she and her forever-fiance Alex Rodriguez playing softball at a luxe Miami estate, where she’s pretending to self-isolate. Pretending, being the operant word. In fact, while lecturing her fans and anyone and everyone else that they must stay home, yesterday she had a Miami gym–SoMi Fitness on SW 81st Street–open especially for her and A-Rod, so they could work out. Some of the photos show bodyguards and staff at the gym, too. I’ll bet her personal trainer and life coach, Dodd Romero, was also there. Uh-huh, that’s how she “social distances” and “self-isolates.” And “works from home.” Very appropriate for April Fools Day.

The same goes for Stray-Rod. He’s using his Instagram account to pimp us on his “Home Safe with ARod” show in Instagram. What he really means is “home for thee, but not for me.”

View this post on Instagram

In my “home office” getting ready for today’s installment of “Home Safe with ARod.” . I‘ll be LIVE on my Instagram at 6pmET/3pmPT! Stepping up to the plate today is my special guest, the one and only @garyvee! Got a question for the media mogul? Text it to me at 305-690-0485. . More great guests are coming up, too! @docgooden is on deck for tomorrow’s show and @sebastiancomedy is in the hole for Friday. How’s that for a ? lineup? . Stay safe, everyone, and hope you are enjoying and learning as much from these daily live streams as much as I am. . Who’s tuning in today?

A post shared by Alex Rodriguez (@arod) on Apr 1, 2020 at 1:21pm PDT

Signs on the gym doors say that it is closed. “THE GYM IS NOT OPEN STAY HOME STAY SAFE.” Apparently they forgot to add, “BUT IT’S OPEN FOR J-LO AND A-ROD.”

I called SoMi Fitness today to find out why the gym opened for these two lying, selfish celebs. A man answered the phone and refused to give his name. Even though the pictures make it obvious that the two were working out (they are sweaty and in workout gear), the man claimed they didn’t work out. He said they were there to advise the gym on how to stay in business and make payroll. Wow, a woman of many talents (in addition to serving as P-Diddy’s one-time gun moll): J-Lo, financial advisor! Not likely.

I asked the man at the gym why these matters couldn’t be discussed over the phone and why they were pictured all sweaty in workout clothes if they were there to do business consulting. (Note that in the pic J-Lo is holding a super-sized, rhinestone-encrusted VIP Starbucks cup, probably filled with whatever liquid is fueling her workout.) I also asked him why he was there, since everyone is supposed to be home. His responses weren’t convincing, and he hung up on me when I dug deeper.

I am not the self-isolation police. I hate that everything is closed down and that the American economy has been destroyed. And as a free marketer and freedom lover, I’ve always disdained the nanny state. Even New York Governor Andrew Cuomo admits that his early lockdown order may have spread the virus from young to old.

But I’m doing my part, and these celebs who lecture me are not. This excessively-hyped celebrity “super couple” emperors with no clothing, were there at this gym to work out, not to be business consultants. I wish I could go to my gym to work out as do the rest of us little people. But our gyms are closed . . . for everyone. We’re not celebs. They play by different rules, then lecture us to do as they say, not as they do. Their “down with the struggle” PR is bunk.

It’s also unfair that, earlier this week, a Christian pastor was arrested by a Florida sheriff for hosting prayer services, when J-Lo’s going to the gym. Which is more “essential”? It’s a matter of opinion and debate. First Amendment protections are probably paramount, far above and beyond the “right to work out.” But nobody arrested her, and unlike the minister, she’s not facing criminal charges.

It’s funny that this is the same woman who pointedly included children in cages as part of her recent Superbowl act, as a false statement about legitimate immigration enforcement of our borders (something that, had President Trump been allowed to do more of it, would have certainly saved more lives). Yet, while most of us Americans are stuck in the cages of our homes, she thinks she doesn’t have to stay even in the gilded “cage” of one of her and A-Rod’s gazillion well-appointed, expansive mansions.

J-Lo and A-Rod are phonies. They’re hypocrites. And they’re sorely out of touch with average Americans. They’re elitists who think they are better than the rest of us and don’t have to live under the same restrictions.

What’s sad is that when this is all over, Lopez’s fans will go right back to idolizing the bim.

If they survive.