July 8, 2009, - 4:23 pm
Dying Major City’s Brilliant Leadership Pinpoints Cause of its Doom: Lando Calrissian
By Debbie Schlussel
Poor Billy Dee Williams. The aging actor, struggling to get work in his autumn years, is being targeted by Detroit’s incompetent “leadership” as the cause of the city’s problems. And ya know what? He’s a RACIST!!!!!
So what did Williams–best known as the Star Wars movies’ Lando Calrissian–do wrong?
Well, he didn’t kill anybody. Instead, he did something far worse, outrageous: he is on billboard ads for Colt 45, the alcoholic drink he’s been fronting for decades. That nails it–he must face the electric chair. And then Detroit will arise anew from the ashes.
Put off by a recent spate of billboards around the city that feature actor Billy Dee Williams touting malt liquor with the phrase “works every time,” the City Council on Tuesday began looking at ways to regulate billboard advertising.
“This is killing our community,” Councilwoman JoAnn Watson said after a local minister, Mayowa Lisa Reynolds, appeared before council asking for help.
Uh, no, Billy Dee Williams’ ads are not what’s killing your community, woman. Take a look at your city. It’s a cocktail of crime, drugs, school dropouts, corruption, public assistance, single motherhood, and hip-hop that is killing Detroit. Lando Calrissian and his cheap and easy way to get drunk isn’t what’s pulling the trigger on the late, once-great City of Detroit.
Reynolds said she conducted a survey and found the billboards, which feature a cartoon representation of Williams trying to sell Colt 45, located in every square mile of the city.
Try doing a survey of rap CDs, single mother households, and crack dens. I bet you find one of those in every square acre of the city.
“This is just wrong for our city,” said Reynolds, who then questioned what the slogan, “works every time,” means.
Hmmm . . . funny they don’t protest the ads that tell you condoms work every time (oh, wait, those don’t “work every time”). Or the ads for Detroit’s casinos that create more and more destitution. Or the campaign ads for all of the numerous frauds who serve on the Detroit City Council (who don’t “work every time” or even most of the time).
“That if women drink it, ladies will lose their virginity?” she asked. “Or a man will do things out of character?”
Yeah, that’s the ticket. Blame the over 75% out-of-wedlock birth rate in Detroit and ten-year-olds having sex in the city on Lando Calrissian pimping alcohol. I see the connection. Don’t you? I guess the irony is lost on her that at least one of the billboards is on top of a 24-hour “adult video” store, you know one of those filth vendors she has no problem with the operation of within her city’s limits.
She added that she did not find the billboards in nearby communities such as Royal Oak and Plymouth.
“It’s an issue of racism and perversity,” Watson said.
Racism and perversity? Has this woman listened to a hip hop song lately? Has she watched BET? You can find both of those–consumed in vast quantities in Detroit–in both of those. And again, all those adult video stores and strip clubs in her city? Hello . . . ?
Ah, so now Billy Dee Williams is a self-hating racist. And the target demographic that makes up the vast majority of consumers of Colt 45 had a gun put to their head, were kidnapped, and forced to enter the beer and wine shack to buy the drink.
Council directed its Research and Analysis Division to see what action council could take and whether council could halt the erection of new billboards.
More Detroit tax money wasted on stupidity, as the city continues its rot.
Council President Kenneth Cockrel Jr. said he too had problems with the billboards but tempered his criticism by suggesting that the ads wouldn’t go up if people didn’t buy the products.
“We also have to check ourselves,” he said. “I see a lot of people buying 40 ounces.”
He gets it. But he’s a lone voice among the “leadership” of the People’s Republic of No You Di’int a/k/a Detroit.
Hey, maybe Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson can fly on over, shakedown Colt 45, and get distributorships of this racist beverage for their friends.
Forget Lando Calrissian saving the galaxy. He has his hands full with the fools running Detroit.
Never Forget Rule #1.
I don’t see too many Colt 45s anymore on the west coast. Malt liquor beer is not my choice. But after you have a couple of beers in you it all taste the same. LOL!
Is there any place worse than Detroit?
californiascreaming on July 8, 2009 at 8:48 pm