July 22, 2008, - 2:45 pm

Jackson Etiquette: When in Doubt , Name Your Kids After Linens

By Debbie Schlussel
Apparently, loony former “King of Pop” Michael Jackson got tired of being outdone by other celebs, who gave their kids such “beautiful” and “creative” names like Apple (Gwyneth Paltrow’s brat), Pilot Inspektor (Jason Lee’s spawn), and Moxie CrimeFighter (Penn Jillette’s kid).
Either I’m behind the times or he changed the kid’s name, but I’ve just learned the important world news (from the July 28, 2008 issue of People) that Jackson’s youngest kid, age 6, is named “Blanket.” What–Pillow, Mattress, Percale, 3,000-Thread, and Comforter were already taken? Who needs Biblical names like Sarah and Jacob when you can name your kid after linens?

blanketjackson.jpg

“White” Men Can’t Name Kids:

Prince, Paris, and Blanket Jackson

Apparently, the former pop star was in need of attention so he wore his usual weirdo mask and pajamas and took “his” three kids (formerly blond and now brunette or wearing wigs), including Blanket, to a Vegas bookstore. The funny thing is that “People” said that Jackson was:

wrapped up in a blanket.

Given the history of accusations against Jackson for child molestation and given the name of his kid, I got confused about which kind of blanket they were referring to–Blanket Jackson or an inanimate sleep accoutrement.
Good luck when this kid gets teased mercifully as “Wet Blanket.”
Yet another scintillating example of why celebrities should set the social and political agenda for America.

michaeljacksonwheelchair.jpg






28 Responses

Wacko,MOOdonna,Jennifer Lopez,and any Simpson(including O.J.)please go away! None of you are interesting… thanks Chief

Chiefscotty24 on July 22, 2008 at 3:17 pm

I’m gonna say that maybe, these kids aren’t going to even notice how funky their names are as they grow up (at least as soon as they get old enough to ‘get off the farm’ and read a newspaper).
And I named my son after the guy in the Subway commercial.

MacBigot on July 23, 2008 at 1:21 am

Nope, none of “his” kids look even the slightest bit Black to me.

OldSchoolW on July 23, 2008 at 10:53 am

kid’s name is not Blanket..that’s a nickname… his name is prince michael II… you’re sooo smart debbie 😀 next time make some research 1st! dumbass

SR on September 23, 2009 at 6:09 am

    you r soooooooooooo right….who the f*** do you think you are makin fun of michael, there those who love him and would rather not hear your comments!! DEBBIE, shut up unless you know what your talkin about!!!! bitch…backed the f*** off.

    [F-words edited by DS.]

    hill on October 8, 2009 at 6:43 pm

    thank you. see this is why Michael was having such hard times cuz its asses like her that dont know a damn thing. (i mean debbie)

    babee_bee on November 19, 2009 at 7:55 pm

    besides she’s making fun of him when she looks like she injected her lips with shit

    babee_bee on November 19, 2009 at 7:57 pm

    I know Debbie LOOK THESE THINGS UP before they sue you DUMDASS

    LisaMarie Taylor on March 22, 2010 at 10:28 pm

These kids are the sweetest kids ever. Who are you to judge them by their names. Get over it and leave these innocent children alone!!

Hi on October 17, 2009 at 8:33 pm

I feel sorry for these children. Will they ever get to have a normal childhood? I mean my gawd, they can’t even quietly file over the toys at wallyworld without a hundred flash bulbs going off. The guardians really need to keep these children out of the limelight, most of the time, at any rate. I understand why he kept them under veils.

allrightythen on October 26, 2009 at 2:37 pm

Blanket’s a nickname!!! And yeah, they’re fair-skinned but if you look, I mean REALLY look, they’re pure Jackson!! They are gorgeous little children, so let them be children! Yeah, so what if he gets teased for his name? If it’s not that, kids’ll find something else to tease him about! The most malicious children will ALWAYS find something to make fun of the others for, so what difference does it make if his name’s Blanket or James?

Caroline on December 21, 2009 at 12:58 pm

I agree with all the negative comments. WTF is your problem?! He was such a sweet person and WTH! ‘Blanket’ is his NICKNAME!!! BEEOTCH!!! Do a bit of effing research b4 showin’ off your stupidity and cruelty to the world. How could you say things like that?! If you actually knew what you were talking about when you wrote that CRAP you would know that he couldn’t help being white and that the reason (for example) Paris’s name is Paris is because that’s where she was concieved! DUH!! LOOK IT UP! You might be one of the reason’s he’s dead you ass! You know he hated people like you. And by the way. You’ve got the same name as Prince and Paris’s mother!! Bet you didn’t know that. Give that kids some space. They’re just kids. Leave ’em alone. How could you say such hurtful things. I think their names are VERY creative and personal to the Jackson family 🙂 You have no right dissing them. Imagine if you were one of those kids, or even MJ himself! How would you feel? Yeh, THINK ABOUT THAT!
Now I could go on ALL DAY. The list of negative things I coule throw at you is endless!! You beeotch! you don’t have to like MJ or the kids’ names, but that doesn’t mean you have to go showing that to the world, cause really, you’re just showing off how little you know about MJ and how downright STUPID you are.
(thanks for listening 🙂
-J

Jules on December 24, 2009 at 1:43 pm

I know why he went in that wheelchair.
Couse he was trying to not be notice by being someone else.
He was trying to get away tha paparazies.
He was trying to get fridum!

But no no no! Paparazies can´t let him be.
Let him be!
And his children shouldn´t go masked.
I mean, he needs his privacy!
And blanket is a nickname!

somebody on December 29, 2009 at 8:25 am

OH MY GOSH LEAVE THEM ALL ALONE. I MEAN SERIOUSLY WTF IS UR PROPLEM. JUDGIN THEM FOR THA COLOR OF THER SKIN. IT DONT FUCKIN MATTER AND TO BE HONEST I LOVE THERE NAMES. EVEN IF BLANKET WASNT A NICKNAME I WOULD STILL LOVED IT. MICHAEL JACKSON IS THA BIGGEST STAR IN THA WORLD. HES SO MUCH LIKE GOD. HE IS MOST LIKE GOD. AFTER ALLL THATS WHAT HIS NAME MEANS. AND PPLZ ARE JEALOUS SO THEY WANT TO MAKUP THA STUPIDEST THINGS EVA 2 TEAR HIM APART. TO ABBANDON HIM. AND NOW THAT U GUYS HAVE KILLED HIM UR GOIN AFTER HIS SWEET INOCENT CHILDREN THAT DONT HAVE A SAINT AGAISNT ANYONE OR ANYTHING. JUS LEAVE THEM ALONE FOR GOD SAKE.
LEAVE THEM ALONE. WHAT MORE CAN U DO BUT TO TAKE AWAY THA THINGS HE LOVED MOST. WHAT MORE CAN U DO.

lil desi on January 1, 2010 at 5:18 am

What did the kids ever do to you???? I mean soo what, they may not have th traditional everyday names but its unique!!!! Thats why the Celebs name there kids this. And ur ripping them appart here. I mean there so young and thats soo hurtfull to these kids!!!

myself on January 7, 2010 at 6:44 pm

Seriously…just because Michael was the biggest star in the world doesn’t mean you can rip on him for every little thing he does. You’re saying that other celebrities have named their children more unique names. Paris and Prince are pretty unique to me! And FYI, Blanket is a nickname. In all due respect to Michael, I believe you should take this down immediately. It was disrespectful while he was alive, and it is disrespectful now. Go get a life, Debbie, and stop rooting around in Michael’s.

Kelsi on January 20, 2010 at 3:08 am

Give the guy a break and respect the fact that he is dead. If this is how you make your living, then I feel sorry for you because it just shows that you are ignorant and incompetent. Your paycheck is based on making fun of others. Get a life (and how about a real job while you’re at it!!!)

ABC123 on January 21, 2010 at 9:46 pm

Three things.

One: Blanket is a nickname. And I forget the exact story on it, but the term ‘blanket’ is a term of endearment in the Jackson family. (And I think Paris is a lovely name, thank you very much. And if ‘white men can’t name their kids Paris,’ explain Paris Hilton.)

Two: So what if they’re light skinned? The boys look like him in the face (compare them to him in the J5) and Paris just looks like her mother. My uncle Dave has black hair, his wife Diane has dirty blonde hair. One daughter has dirty blonde hair and the other is really blonde. The really blonde daughter married a man with black hair and she has a white-blonde son. And their cousins with dark haired parents turned out blonde. And I know a woman who is half Native American and her son’s father was a blonde white man. Their son has light skin, light brown hair, and light brown eyes. And I’ve seen a mixed girl who looked white except for her features, which were identical to those of her black mother. STUFF LIKE THAT HAPPENS!!! It’s called RECESSIVE GENES!!!

Three: LEAVE MICHAEL AND HIS KIDS ALONE!!!!!

Caroline on January 24, 2010 at 10:56 am

omg wat da heck is wrong wit u r u just happy dat dey now killed michael………. so now ur gonna go for por little blanket how wuld u like t if sum1 went afetr one of ur kids…. i shuldnt have said ur kids cuz of all ur rudeness no1 wuld have even liked u anyways

................ on January 28, 2010 at 8:45 pm

Please forget the fact that this woman and most of her respondents are without education and compassion in every manner. This “person” is within her rights to be ignorant, as unpleasant and revolting as she may be, being as most of the human population are. I’m sure Mr. Jackson would agree (wherever he may be). However, she is, without a doubt, uninformed, uneducated, sensational, classless, vicious and blatantly socially and emotionally retarded. I don’t care if or where people like her MAY HAVE received a rote education, she is uneducated and cancerous to society. If you do not know the inner workings of a being, nor do you understand them in their true sense, please, withhold your forked tongue and focus your venom on yourself, as that is where the true poison lies. Look within your own twisted heart before you voice your opinion of the true heart of another. I wish you a peaceful heart some day… you will no longer write or feel such contempt for the joy and heart of others. May you learn and grow (or die, either way).

Taylor on January 31, 2010 at 3:57 am

why are you talking so horrible about them, you are despicable,
just leave them alone!!

alyssa on February 19, 2010 at 3:28 pm

for the whole wheel chair thing its policy for hospitals to release patients in a wheel chair

prettydee on June 25, 2010 at 2:45 pm

It’s people like you that make me sick to my stomach and would probably make suicidal people want to kill themselves if you talked like them this way. You need to research your topics more often you ignoramus. His kids are just different from every one else just like their father. I mean isn’t that what parents teach their kids at an early age that every one is different in their own special way. I mean these kids have enough problems dealing with their father’s death and they don’t need you talked about them behind their backs on the internet. I’m sure most of the people who are reading this will agree with me.

P.S. Not you Debbie Schlussel.

Jack Mchaerald on June 30, 2010 at 5:13 am

Since you seem to think all of the kids’ names are so weird, let’s take a look at the origins of each name and how Michael came to chose them:

Michael Joseph Jackson, Jr-Named for his father, but soon after his birth, nicknamed Prince in honor of Michael’s maternal grandfather, Prince Albert Scruse (yes, that was the man’s real name; it was an old given name passed down in the family).

Paris Michael Katherine Jackson-Paris just happens to be avery common girls’ name these days, so what is weird or strange about that I have no idea.

Prince Michael Joseph Jackson II-The son actually, legally named after Prince Albert Scruse who was nicknamed Blanket, a ter of affection in the Jackson family-“to blanket” someone means to wrap them in love.

The next time you want to write an article trash talking innocent children’s names, at least try learning the facts and the history behind those names.

denise on July 2, 2010 at 11:34 pm

Why don’t people just leave Michael ALONE! Whoever agrees with this, their messed up, ok? Yes i know these are opinions but if your going to say something that over half the population of the world doesn’t want to see, don’t. say. it.
This is rude as hell. Serously if you can say this and your fine with it because you think it’s right, well you are one of the many that only understand a minimum of -20,000% of MJ.
Michael was a fantastic father, he raised his children very well. His kids are wonderful and much better off if they didn’t see or hear this.
Hate is NOT what we need.
It’s the love L.O.V.E
There I said my peace now MJ fans God bless you and love you
Haters go get a life

LostChild on September 22, 2010 at 6:45 pm

WOW, Ms. Schlussel, you are ignorant right from the first to the very last line of this article, and I mean ignorant in all facets of its meaning. As others have pointed out, too ignorant to even do a little research; too ignorant to care about the effect your ridiculous small-minded opinion has on children; too ignorant to see truth when it is staring you in the face eg Michael Jackson had vitiligo, so YES , his skin is white…I have friends fighting Cancer, another with Lupus, another with Fibrolmyalgia…perhaps you’d like to take a pot-shot at them for the diseases they battle, too????
For decencies sake, take this shameful ( for you!) piece of medialoid trash down, it doesn’t deserve to be read. I am however grateful I read it as I can now be sure to write to the companies who advertise on your site, and let them know I’ll be boycotting them until they withdraw financial support from sites like this, full of hate and ignorance.
Two quotes for you:
“What the world needs now, is love, sweet love”
“Every dollar you spend is a vote for what you believe in” — I don’t believe in you, mwah-hahahaha!

karencanada on September 23, 2010 at 12:04 am

Disgracful article…What is this???…Ridicule Michael, now ridicule his children??……Every child in this world has a nickname……My 14 year old daughter is Olivia…..she gets “Chicken pie”….my twin boys are Charlie & Oliver…..they get “Chuck Chuck” & “Splodge”……Would you now like to ridicule me and my kiddies, for gods sake get a life…????

JOANNE DAVIES on September 23, 2010 at 5:50 am

LOOK TO ALL THOSE PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT PRINCE,PARIS AND BLANKET LEAVE THEM ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OKAY JEEZ THEY NEVER MESSED WTH YOU SO PLEASE LEAVE THEM ALONE GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Adrienne on September 8, 2011 at 7:01 am

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