June 19, 2011, - 4:05 pm
On Father’s Day–And Every Day–I Miss You, Dad!
I remember Father’s Day 2007 like it was yesterday. My father was dying of pancreatic cancer, and I knew that it would be his last Father’s Day. At the card section of the store, I had sunglasses on and was crying because I knew I was losing the most important part of my life. How do you buy a card for your father when you know it will be the last one you will ever give him? Nothing is special enough, when you know you are saying good-bye to the world’s greatest dad.
Me and My Dad, Ten Days After I Was Born
My Dad (Center) Receives Award From
Michigan Lions Club for Providing Free Eye Care to the Poor, Blind
Even though it has been nearly four years since I lost my dad, I miss him every single day and think about all he taught me. A father’s relationship with his kids is the most important one a child will ever have. A father teaches his sons how to behave. How to treat fellow men and how to treat women. He teaches his daughters how to behave, what’s not acceptable to wear, and what kind of treatment they should accept from men. He teaches not just by word, admonishment, lecture, punishment, and reward. He teaches by example. Talk is cheap. The deeds must match the talk.
My dad not only talked the talk, he walked the walk. We always knew he loved and cared about us and our well-being. I learned so much from him–about sacrifice, about doing the right thing, about standing up for what you believe in even when everyone else around you is going with the flow and even mocking you for speaking out. He taught me about principle, critical thinking, reading between the lines, and valuing people by their values and conduct, not their fame and fortune. My dad taught me the importance of G-d, country, and family. He taught me history and education, the importance of being informed and digging deeper. My dad taught me the importance of American patriotism and serving the country, as he did in the U.S. Army during Vietnam. Dad taught me to be a proud American and a proud Jew. You can read more about my amazing father, H. L. Schlussel, MD–a unique and rare father and person–in my eulogy for him, which I delivered at his funeral.
When I look around with about half of America’s kids now being born out of wedlock, with the right now mimicking the left in embracing and exalting single mothers like Bristol Palin because they came out of the right vagina and had something come out of theirs without a husband and father to help raise it, I realize more and more every day how lucky I was to have such a great dad in my life. We know that kids who don’t have fathers in their lives are less likely to do well in school, more likely to do drugs, commit crime, have sex at a younger age, and drop out of school. In short, the odds are against those without dads, despite the dopey way they are portrayed in the media and entertainment. And good fathers are the ultimate national security.
My father tried his best and then some to raise us as happy, productive, responsible kids. He sacrificed his own medical practice to be with us more and see less patients. He also sacrificed money to see his patients longer and counsel them more. If he had a patient who was sick at home, he still made house calls, something completely anachronistic. He gave free medical care to Vietnam veterans for decades because he was so upset by how they were treated after the war. If a patient was poor and didn’t have government coverage through Medicaid or Medicare, he treated them for free. He didn’t just teach us how to help the less fortunate and treat people with respect. He did it by example. My father wasn’t a rich man financially. But he was rich in every other way and through him, we were, too.
Me and My Dad
I’m occasionally asked by Palinmessiah followers why it’s important for mothers to be there for their kids when I say that a father’s relationship with his kids is far more important. That’s because we need fathers who are fathers to their kids, not fathers like Todd Palin and the other Mr. Moms around the country who are mothers to their children and give the alpha male role to their feminist wives and womb donors to their kids. I’m lucky. My father put his foot down when my mother wanted to run a business. He knew that a successful business takes its own parent. You cannot be mother to both your kids and your business … or your political career. Something–rather, someone–always has to suffer. And it’s always the kids, who are, indeed, regarded as something and not someone by feminist moms who have taken the Gloria Steinem oath of how to destroy your family with a career. Sarah Palin told Oprah that Bristol doesn’t need a man in her life. Um, tell that to the kid with the pretentious name and no father around, Tripp.
My father–like fewer and fewer American men–knew that Mr. Moms are not fathers to their kids. Their male and female children learn the wrong message–not how to be a man or how to be treated by one, but, rather, how to favor masculine, alpha male women and stay home with disrespected feminized Mr. Mom men–not a good thing.
My dad was against the weakening of America, whether through the feminist movement and women’s lib, the glamorizing unwed mothers, the porn industry that Hugh Hefner created, left-wing politics, the attack on religion, and other ideological concepts that have unfortunately succeeded slowly but surely in breaking down the American family, the American culture, and America as a nation.
I am glad my father isn’t around to see how much America has declined further in just the four years since his death. But I wish I had my father around for just a few more years. It is never enough–there has never been enough time, when you have a great father like I had, and he passes away. But like most who had a good dad, I remember him every day and think about what he would say when I made a certain move or decision, how he would advise me. His impression on me is forever, and though he is gone from this earth physically, he is with me every moment.
Dad, I miss you so much. Happy Father’s Day.
Tags: Dad, Dr. H. L. Schlussel, Father's Day, fathers, H. L. Schlussel MD, H.L. Schlussel, importance of fathers, MD, my dad, my father
Very touching and astute post, Debbie. I’m sure your dad was very proud of you and the woman you turned out to be.
DS_ROCKS! on June 19, 2011 at 4:16 pm