By Debbie Schlussel

I probably should have titled this, “Hey, Maybe This Will Make Them Like Us Better #19,476, 552.”  I’ve written before about the American attempts to make Islamic versions of  “Sesame Street,” not just in the Palestinian Authority (where one version taught kids at age three that they should become martyrs against the Jews) and Bangladesh, where they are now so “moderate” from watching Al-Big Bird and Ahmed Oscar the Grouch that they are putting our friend Salah Uddin Shoiab Choudhury on trial for his life because he made friends with Jews and went to Israel.  So, don’t expect this utter waste of money in Pakistan to make a difference.  But, then, you knew that already.

Groverhu FUBAR: Islamic Sesame Street an Endless Waste of US Dollars

Moderate, peaceful Muslims are as rare as a Snuffleupagus sighting.  No, rarer. When will Americans say “Enough to this ‘hearts and minds’ BS!”?  Sadly, never.  Tell me why the Republicans didn’t cut this out of the budget.  Suggested theme song:  “Can You Tell Me How to Get to Jihad Street?”

Pakistani children will soon start experiencing what millions in the west have done for more than four decades – the joys of Sesame Street.

In a $20m (£12m) remake of the classic American children’s programme, the setting for the show has moved from the streets of New York to a lively village in Pakistan with a roadside tea and snacks stall, known as a dhaba, some fancy houses with overhanging balconies along with simple dwellings, and residents hanging out on their verandas. . . .

The Pakistani version, in which characters will speak mostly in Urdu, will feature Rani, a cute six-year-old Muppet, the child of a peasant farmer, with pigtails, flowers in her hair and a smart blue-and-white school uniform. Her curiosity and questions about the world will, it is hoped, make her a role model for Pakistani children.

The financing for the series comes from USAid, the economic assistance arm of the US government, which aims to help the country’s young learn some basic words and numbers through Sesame Street’s fun style of education.

Yay! The Count can teach them numbers using IEDS. Cool. Oh, wait, he’s been replaced.  Musta been that “Zionist-looking” visage of evil.

Elmo, the cheerful monster toddler from the original, will be in the Pakistani version, with new local personality touches. But other American favourites such as Count von Count – a lovable vampire who would rather count telephone rings than answer the phone – will make way for local characters in SimSim Humara (“Ours”), the Pakistani edition.

The programme, which will start filming this summer in Lahore and begin airing in the autumn, is targeted particularly at deprived children outside the big cities and will be shown on the national state broadcaster, PTV, so it should be available even in the smallest village. Following the Sesame Street formula, each show will pick one word and one number to highlight.

Word #1: jihad. Word #2: the Great Satan. Word #3: abed [literally “slave” in Arabic, but really the Muslim world version of the N-word].

“The idea is to prepare and inspire a child to go on the path of learning, and inspire the parents of the child to think that the child must be educated,” said Faizaan Peerzada, the chief operating officer at the Lahore-based Rafi Peer Theatre Workshop, which was awarded the commission for the project in collaboration with Sesame Workshop, the creator of the American show. “This is a very serious business, the education of the children of Pakistan at a critical time.”

Awesome. The terrorists and America-haters of Islam will be educated! Alhamdillullah [praise allah]. Hmmm . . . how did the American grad school education of Khalid Sheikh Muhammad work out? How about the cradle-to-massacre American-tax-funded education of Nidal Malik Hasan? Or the Colorado university schooling of late Bin Laden guru (and one of the world’s foremost Islamic scholars) Syed Qutb?

And here’s the money quote: no worries, as America will not be promoted, just feminism (which will go over like pork and beans during Ramadan).

The show will have strong female characters and
carry an implicit message of tolerance but will feature no pro-American propaganda or overt challenge to hardline religious sentiment.

Because, hey, why on earth would we want to do that?!

Under Barack Obama, US civilian assistance to Pakistan has tripled to $1.5bn a year but the money does not seem to have made much obvious impact.

Naw. You don’t say.

The $20m US grant will produce the Pakistani Sesame Street for four years, with 78 episodes in Urdu and 56 in regional languages, a radio show, mobile TV vans to show the programme in remote areas and a travelling Muppet roadshow.

We should take the $20 mill and give it to Americans as a reward for killing Pakistani jihadis or on top of the money already offered for finding Bin Laden.  Or how about to serve as informants Muslim mortgage defrauders and other such Islamic scam artists on U.S. soil, who use those ill-gotten gains here to fund jihad abroad?

As I’ve noted on this site before, this “Sesame Street” baloney has been tried before throughout the Middle East and Africa.  And guess what?  It hasn’t made anyone like America or Western values any more than their current total hate of it.  In fact, you could argue that the more we’ve spent on “Sesame Street” in Muslim nations, the more extremist they’ve become.  The facts bear this out.

Hey, when do they behead Bert and Ernie for appearing to be gay? 3-2-1 . . .  And Big Bird?  Well, after a nice halal slaughter, he’d make a great Iftar dinner. I heard Oscar and Grover might be collaborators. Time for a stoning. And Susan . . . er, Sawsan? I can see some toenail protruding from the black sheet, and that might turn your average Mohammed on. Try her as an adulterer.

Note to State Department/USAID file:  no big-nosed muppets.  Too Zionist-looking.