By Debbie Schlussel
This weekend’s new releases include “Because I Said So,” the movie aimed at teens and starring Mandy Moore. (“The Messengers” was not screened for critics, a sign that it’s bad.)
This movie is so horrid, I wanted to walk out several times, and finally had the guts to do so about 45 minutes into it. My only regret is that I did not walk out sooner. Trust me–there is NO way the movie could have redeemed itself. It’s the most annoying celluloid garbage I’ve seen to date.

This movie is worse than a chick flick and calling it one would be an insult to chick flicks. It also stars Diane Keaton, who comes off as a dirty old-lady. She plays Moore’s mother who is trying to marry her off and secretly sets her up with a rich perfectionist. Meanwhile, a poor but nice and handsome single father who plays jazz wants to date the daughter and he secretly arranges to meet and date her. The mother doesn’t like this and meddles, but as with all predictable movies, you know what happens.
Apparently, Diane Keaton never heard the phrase “growing old gracefully,” because this movie was absolutely shrill and unfunny. Filled with snorts and other stupid jokes, it’s a complete waste of time. As my friend, Detroit Free Press movie critic Terry Lawson (who was still watching this unbearable movie when I walked out), wrote:

Basically a female minstrel show . . . . It’s hard to imagine Annie Hall would have ever aged this badly.

Right on. Guys, if your wife or girlfriend (or daughter) insists on you going to this movie, hang yourself first.
Why? Because I said so. After seeing,er . . . surviving this movie, you’ll certainly want to.