By Debbie Schlussel
Here are are a few showbiz items of interest:
* Did you see Jack Bauer’s Dracula moment on “24,” Sunday Night? In a novel kill, he bites part of the Islamic terrorist’s neck off. Reports today’s USA Today:

Sutherland relished the neck-biting escape in Sunday’s opener – “I liked that,” he says with a grin – and reveals a chunk of cantaloupe substituted for his captor’s Adam’s apple he spat out before his exit.

Coming soon to the show, real-life conservative and “Silver Spoon”ster Rick(y) Schroder (who also left acting for several years to raise his family in Western America). Unfortunately, also coming soon, annoying actor and ex-Mr. Hilary Swank, Chad Lowe. Was on “Politically Incorrect” with him, once. Oy!

PC “24” Artwork by David Lunde/Lundesigns
* So much for in-your-face “Gays Reform the Straights” shows. Bravo’s “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” will end after this summer.
* Remember Rosie O’Donnell’s anti-Asian “ching chong” routine on “The View”? Michelle Malkin was all over it, saying the ethnic slur was used against her as a kid. Well, now, Chinese-American rapper Jin has a new rap against Rosie, part of it in Cantonese. Nichi Bei Times, a Japanese-American newspaper, reports that it includes voice samples from Donald Trump.
* Divorce Superbowl Karma?: The NFL rejected slutty-mom-with-no-underwear, Britney Spears’, offer to appear in a Superbowl commercial for the NFL Network, the NY Daily News says. Her crotch-flashing was the reason: “She’s too much of a train wreck,” an NFL insider tells the paper.
But Spears’ slacker soon-to-be ex, K-Fed a/k/a Kevin Federline, will star in a self-deprecating Superbowl ad for Nationwide Mutual Insurance, as a fast-food employee dreaming of rapping in a slick video, USA Today reports. And K-Fed’s ad garnered a front-page-of-the-Money-Section article in the nationwide paper.
Unfortunately, Paris Hilton will also be in a Superbowl ad. Eeuuw!