June 29, 2010, - 3:34 pm

“Vermonster,” “Luther Burger”: What’s the Grossest, Most Calorie-Laden Item You’ve Ever Eaten?

By Debbie Schlussel

I eat a very healthy diet, and even if kosher dietary prohibitions didn’t keep me from eating most of these items, below, I still wouldn’t.  The idea turns my stomach.   But I believe in freedom of consumption.  Even though I wouldn’t eat it, if you want to, that’s your bid’ness.  Keep the food police far away and out of our lives.

lutherburger

Check out these high-calorie, stomach- and appetite-expanding items on restaurant menus across America.  What’s the grossest, most calorie-laden thing you’ve ever eaten?  Do any beat these choices?

•In Georgia, you can get what’s called a Luther Burger, supposedly named after singer Luther Vandross. It’s a ground beef patty topped with bacon and cheese, sandwiched between two Krispy Kreme doughnuts instead of a bun.

•In Iowa, there’s a hot beef sundae, which made its debut at the Iowa State Fair a few years ago, O’Connor says. It’s mashed potatoes, roast beef, beef gravy, cheddar cheese and a little cherry tomato on top to look like a cherry on a sundae.

•In Vermont, there’s Ben and Jerry’s “Vermonster,” which includes 20 scoops of ice cream, hot fudge, bananas, cookies, brownies and any other topping you could possibly want.

•In Connecticut, diners at Doogie’s can get a 2-foot-long hot dog on a roll with onions, chili, cheese and bacon and a side of fries.

•In New Mexico, recipes for a Frito pie vary, but most include Fritos corn chips, beef, beans, onion, cheddar cheese, lettuce and tomato.

“It almost seems like a salad,” O’Connor says. “It does have some healthy things on it, but it’s all these toppings on a giant pile of Fritos.”

•In Colorado, the Jack-n-Grill has a 7-pound breakfast burrito. It’s made with seven potatoes, 12 eggs, a pound of ham and a whole onion, plus cheese and chili.

•In Arizona, the Heart Attack Grill offers what’s called the Quadruple Bypass Burger with four beef patties, eight slices of cheese, tomato, onion and sauce on a bun.

Yuck to all of those for me, especially far-left Ben & Jerry’s. The gluttony of these just ain’t for me.  Would you try any of these? And, again, have you ever eaten anything that matches or beats these calorically-endowed entrees?




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44 Responses

My limit is a pound of good food. Any more than that, I gain weight I don’t need.

NormanF on June 29, 2010 at 3:55 pm

I live in Georgia, and I’ve never seen a Luther Burger, but the thought of one turns my stomach. A friend says it’s the combination of sugar and savory that makes it so good. Yuk! Krispy Kreme doughnuts are great hot off the conveyor belt, though. My husband and I will stop when we see the “Hot Now” sign lit up. We scarf them down with ice cold milk, right there at the store. Yum!

Lilida on June 29, 2010 at 4:01 pm

You must be hungry being that today is a fast day. 17th of Tammuz. Why else would you talk about food?

Ruth on June 29, 2010 at 4:06 pm

My suggestion for you locals, is to go and Eat @ Tony’s restaurant off of I-75 @ the Birch run exit.
They have a 6 egg ham n cheese omelet complete with a pound of cheese, and a pound of ham, and I think it comes with a pound of hash browns on the side…The BLT contains a full pound of Bacon! (if your NOT Kosher)
They also have ice cream sundae’s containing a GALLON of ice cream for dessert! It’s the whip, but you can’t eat there every day or else you’ll end up in the emergency room, or worse, fatter than a tub of lard Walrus and Hippo combined.lol

Who cares? on June 29, 2010 at 4:08 pm

If I want to get fat, a thick crust bacon cheeseburger pizza will do the job.

Rick on June 29, 2010 at 4:08 pm

I would eat a Luther Burger in a second.

DS_ROCKS! on June 29, 2010 at 4:09 pm

Whole side of ribs. Jets pizza with everything. Wendy’s triple baconator, w/cheese. When I decide to indulge, these are nice.lol Real, premium Breyers or Hagandez.

samurai on June 29, 2010 at 4:40 pm

Poor Luther Vandross was a wonderful artist but, he suffered from both hypertension and diabetes-no surprise if he was eating Luther burgers.

I don’t eat the big gross stuff and eat more fish than meat. My favorite food is Japanese and, I spend quite a bit of time there. I eat sashimi, sushi and most other lesser-known Japanese fare. It’s high in sodium though so, you have to be careful about that.

However, the grossest thing I’ve ever eaten was live snails. I’ve eaten escargots and love fresh abalone, itself a type of snail. I’ve had them pulled from the water live and served immediately thereafter. Trust me. It’s wonderful when prepared the Japanese way.

But, the particular snails I refer to here were different altogether. You know those snails that live in home aquariums where the shell spirals up? These were very similar but bright green. When the Japanese sushi chef recommended them, I trusted him because I’d eaten with him many times before. They came with two small skewers and, when I tried to pry them out à la escargots, the “foot” pulled back in! I said, “Oh! Honda san (the chef), they’re alive!” He confirmed that fact and encouraged me laughing, “Sorera o k?geki shite taberu!” (“Attack them to eat them”) – which I did. I’m not at all squeamish but they struggled against being swallowed as much as I strugged to swallow them. I won! but, I don’t think I’ll order them again. They also kind of tasted like mud.

Was that gross enough?

Tom in Michigan on June 29, 2010 at 5:08 pm

Har har har. That Luther thing looks like something out of one of Homer’s dream sequences on The Simpsons. “Mmmm…Doughnut Burger!”

Daniel H on June 29, 2010 at 5:11 pm

Chocolate covered bacon at the WI state fair. It wasn’t half bad actually. The wierdest part was cold bacon. State Fairs seem to bring out the worst in culinary curiosities.

Kaiser Sousay on June 29, 2010 at 5:19 pm

I’m feeling a bit green myself, Tom in MI. This is disgusting. I can eat and eat and not gain an ounce even now. Nonetheless, I don’t eat garbage. Pigs aren’t kosher but I am so I don’t eat like one.

My b/p is almost low, ditto heart rate. Cholesterol has been high lifelong even tho I eat healthy, I’m a protein type and need lots of meat, but new evidence indicates it’s carbs that shoot up the triglycerides anyway. I’ve eliminated all grains except a bit of rice and 2 small challa rolls on Shabbat. Being Sephardi, we don’t add sugar or oil to our challa so it’s less caloric. I estimate my total body fat to be about 23% and I’m a 64 year old woman who’s never had a surgical procedure in her life. When I was 40 and more active it was about 18%. Cholesterol has been dropping slowly but I refuse to take statins that can eat my liver and give me Alzheimer’s.

Please do not get on me about being a vegger and getting protein from beans. Can’t do it. I lack the enzyme to digest them and can’t use Beano because of Penicillin allergy. The only time I did get some fat on me was when I did veggie and I did it correctly. There are different metabolic types.

mk750 on June 29, 2010 at 5:57 pm

Never had one myself, but Tortelvis of Dread Zeppelin recommends…

A triple cheeseburger monte cristo, some of those spicy fries, and a diet soda.

Probably the worst thing I eat is the Jack in the Box Ultimate bacon cheeseburger. You have to hustle right through the thing before the “cheese” congeals and it’s game over.

Richard on June 29, 2010 at 6:37 pm

    Tort would know what’s got the most calories and taste’s good.
    Did you go to the Dred concert last Friday? It was pretty cool…

    Who cares? on June 29, 2010 at 7:49 pm

    Oh yeah, I remember Tortelvis!

    I heard a story about the Original Elvis’ favorite food of all time: a loaf of unsliced white bread, hollowed out and filled with peanut butter, grape jelly and a pound of cooked bacon. Then the whole thing would be deep-fried. There was a diner in Denver that made them, and from time to time, Elvis would fly one of his cronies out there pick up a takeout order of these sandwiches.

    rglovejoy on June 29, 2010 at 11:07 pm

How about a Michael Moore special in Michigan? I don’t know what would be in it, but you can just imagine what is in it, or amke something up, while we buy up gift certificates for Michael More to enjoy a few free meals at the Heart Attack Grill. I am from New Orleans where we don’t ask what it was 🙂

Thomas Forsyth on June 29, 2010 at 6:47 pm

Hmmm . . . that would have to be the time I chased a homemade sausage, egg, & cheese biscuit with a quart of hot bacon grease.

Graty Slapchop on June 29, 2010 at 6:48 pm

You know, those things don’t even look good..yiiii, donuts and hamburgers? When I have my weak moments I go to MacDonalds for egg or sausage McMuffins, or double burgers w/cheese and small fries. I try to do it not more than once or twice a month. My other weakness is pizza; I usually get veggie pizza, but the cheese makes it qualify as junk food; that is also once or twice a month. Soy pizza just doesn’t cut it for me.

Little Al on June 29, 2010 at 7:36 pm

Luther had diabetes and hypertension…and died from a stroke in 2005…???…and I want eat this why??…people need to get a clue

Catfur on June 29, 2010 at 9:02 pm

Is this haram?! lol…

Norman on June 29, 2010 at 9:54 pm

I used to eat a healthy diet, until the won took office.. Stress I guess. I have put on 16lbs since he took the reigns. I was thinking of a lawsuit for presidential weight gain. Of course I am being snarky, my weight, my issue.. I am trying to get a handle on it again. That said, I would not eat that!!!

sharon on June 29, 2010 at 10:11 pm

At the San Diego County Fair they make something called “Deep Fried Twinkies.” Far as I can make out it’s like Twinkie Tempura. They also make that Krispy Kreme burger.

Just the thought of it makes me want to puke.

PS I thought the Ben and Jerry’s Vermonster was a party platter. What do I know?

SoCal Mother on June 30, 2010 at 1:13 am

    Thought it woldnu’t to give it a shot. I was right.

    Dayana on May 24, 2014 at 12:58 am

I would never, ever, EVER eat any of those – especially the luther burger! Disgusting!
While I personally have no problem with bacon (one of those non-kosher Jews :D), it’s the combination of high fat beef, cheese AND a DONUT that makes me queasy just thinking about it.
Ugh…

Dina Dunkelman on June 30, 2010 at 1:25 am

I’ve been married to a Korean woman for the past thirty years now and we eat a lot of rice, kimchee, fish, chicken and vegetables. Occasionally some meat like a roast, almost never potatoes and hardly anything fried. I’m the same weight today that I was thirty years ago. And if you’ve ever been to Korea you will notice that you don’t see very many overweight Koreans. Maybe there is something to their diet that we should be paying attention to. The food items that Debbie mentioned were enough to make me gag.

kenny komodo on June 30, 2010 at 2:26 am

DS: But I believe in freedom of consumption. Even though I wouldn’t eat it, if you want to, that’s your bid’ness.

Are you sure? How about those who choose to be vegetarians? Do you still believe in their freedom of consumption? Or because they choose vegetarian lifestyle for reason you don’t know, they can only be hippies, liberal lefts, girlie men with soy-boobs? Conservatives don’t have freedom of choice to be vegetarian? Being vegetarian is mutually exclusive with being conservative?

Your conclusion on man boob solely blaming it for vegetarian lifestyle was short sighted conclusion. Short sighted because you didn’t involve data where there’s much more vegetarians who don’t have man boobs. But you’re entitle to your own vegetarian bashing close mindedness.

Unknown to your limited thinking, vegetarian conservatives are the most balanced and fair people who will surely support Israel right for self defense. But you are too blind to see that, blinded by thinking you are superior free-thinker.

AlchemicalXform on June 30, 2010 at 2:46 am

    Debbie doesn’t seem to know that many ULTRA-Orthodox Jews are vegetarians because it simplifies kashrut. These are people one would hardly call liberal. Also many non-ultra but definitely Orthodox, Right Wing Jews in Israel also are vegetarian for the same reasons and because they are aware of health reasons. There are many more delicious vegetarian foods available here than in the US. We also have a thriving Organics industry and it’s a lot easier to get organic and safe personal care products, not that I usually eat those. Now, if they’d just let us have raw milk…

    mk750 on June 30, 2010 at 8:04 am

Carne Asada Fries or Carne Asada Nachos. If you live in SoCal you know what is up. Usually best consumed after 2:00 A.M. after the bars have closed down.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carne_asada_fries

CaliforniaScreaming on June 30, 2010 at 3:48 am

    No doubt Carne Asada Fries with cheese and sour cream! So Cal’s best red-eye am food! I’ll split one once a year,I’m afraid to think how many calories in that bomb!

    Chiefscotty24 on June 30, 2010 at 9:14 am

I don’t keep kosher, but that Luther Burger is disgusting.

That being said, these restaurants wouldn’t be in business unless somebody liked their food. Maybe they have a low-calorie menu we don’t know about? :+)

One thing I do NOT like is when restaurants “spike” their food with empty calories. For example, I know of a restaurant that injects butter into their hamburgers to make them more juicy. Other restaurants spike their food with extra sugar and salt.

I’m not sure anyone can regulate these things and it’s probably futile to try. The end conclusion is that you have to prepare your own meals to gain control of what you eat. Even then, you are never in full control of what you’re eating these days.

There is NO Santa Claus on June 30, 2010 at 9:50 am

Gross.

musiccgirl on June 30, 2010 at 11:40 am

I, too, eat healthy except when I go on vacation.

I take my parents on a big vacation once a year and they LOVE to eat and since I’m on vacation I let myself go a bit.

Here are 2 of the biggest guilty pleasures I get on vacation:

1. In Las Vegas, we always go to the Carnival World Buffet at the Rio Hotel. It’s one of the world’s biggest buffets and they have EVERYTHING in the world. There is nothing outrageously bad, but there is just tons of everything!

2. In Hollywood, we always go to Pink’s Hot Dogs. Thank goodness I don’t live there or I’d be 500 pounds. They have these specialty hot dogs that are enormous! And, they taste super good. My favorite is the Martha Stewart, with sauerkraut and a whole bunch more toppings. They have a web site where you can check them out.

It’s a good thing I go to the gym at least 5 times a week and stay pretty disciplined after those vacations or I’d be in big trouble.

Jeff_W on June 30, 2010 at 12:22 pm

If you want to see some serious power eating, watch Man vs. Food on the Travel Channel.

Jeff_W on June 30, 2010 at 12:25 pm

And this as we come upon the annual Nathan’s hot dog eating contest at Coney Island. Joey Chestnut has won the glutton’s world series and Super Bowl the last 3 years in a row…all against Japan’s Kobayashi. Now it seems he won’t be able to compete this year.

And as for that hot dog place in CT…Doogie’s has one location in Newington, in Central CT and they will be opening up one in Waterbury.

By the way, they have a website…

http://www.doogiesfranchise.com/index.htm

Bob Porrazzo on June 30, 2010 at 2:40 pm

The he in question who won’t be competing is Kobayashi.

Bob Porrazzo on June 30, 2010 at 2:42 pm

Just got back from lunch at Chili’s and had this excellent burger that they put triple thick bacon on. The bacon they put on it is kind of like that thick bacon they serve at Cracker Barrel. But it only had one hamgurger on it. I would have ordered it as a double cheeseburger with extra bacon if they had it on the menu.

Jarhead on June 30, 2010 at 4:30 pm

My son (15) just thought up a grilled cheese and hotdog sandwich for his power lunch. (kinda defeats the purpose of low fat all beef hotdogs)

Barely There on June 30, 2010 at 4:34 pm

Homer Simpsons’ Space-Age Out-of-This-World Moon Waffles

* Ingredients
+ One bag caramel cubes
+ Waffle mix
+ One bottle Liquid Smoke
+ One stick butter
* Directions
+ Empty bag of caramels onto waffle iron.
+ Add generous portion of waffle batter.
+ Add one bottle of Liquid Smoke.
+ Cook until burnt.
+ Wrap waffle around a stick of butter.
+ Serve on a toothpick.

Mmmm, bacon. That’s probably the only thing you need to add to this recipe.

Jarhead on June 30, 2010 at 5:20 pm

Yes, this is just the sort of garbage that Homer Simpson would consume. Then again, he’s been known to consume stuff even a goat would reject. (I seem to remember those Waffles from the episode where Homer skips church.)

I saw a report recently that noted some signs of America’s food toxic culture over the last 30 years or so: Average weight for adult males and females up around 30-35 pounds, average waists up about five inches. Obesity and diabetes up among children. And dinner plates that used to average 9″ or so are now approaching 12″. What were reasonable portions a generation ago now look meager on such plates, so … fill ‘er up!

Raymond in DC on June 30, 2010 at 7:59 pm

Most of the time these super callorie meals are designed for and by potheads who feel starved after smoking the stuff.

RG on June 30, 2010 at 11:29 pm

Didn’t Luther Vandross die rather recently, & could it be from eating just one too many Luther Burgers?

enemaofthestatistquo on July 1, 2010 at 9:56 pm

There was something (probably still is) in Los Angeles called the Hollenbeck Burrito. It has beans and cheese and lettuce and chunks of beef in it, wrapped in a ginormous tortilla and is so big, that it takes half a roll of aluminum foil to cover it. You cart it out in a cardboard box. Could easily feed all of Somalia and I never was able to finish it in one sitting. Or two… or three. Best cure for a hangover or the hungers after playing music in the clubs. Haven’t lived in the area for quite a few years now, so I’m not sure it’s still there. Good times indeed!

hockeykevin on July 6, 2010 at 12:32 pm

I have had the Ben and Jerry’s Vermonster before. I’m not fat and I do eat pretty healthy. Me and 9 other friends split one, and we didn’t even finish it. It was a reward after our first AP test… It did fill me up for the rest of the day, but it was actually pretty fun!

Becca on August 6, 2010 at 11:07 pm

I did a post awhile back about the most disgusting thing I’ve ever heard of. Debuting this year at Toronto’s CNE – Deep Fried Butter. I’m serious- I just found the post http://rooferonfire.blogspot.com/2010/08/yummy-treat_20.html

While I don’t eat meat now, I must say the most deliciously hellacious thing I’ve consumed is a Montreal Meat Poutine.

It starts with fries and is topped with cheese curds, gravy, and Montreal Smoked Beef. (similar to corned beef or pastrami, but infinitely tastier than either)It’s worth the trip to a very decadent but extremely Jew-friendly city.

Mika on November 2, 2010 at 4:56 am

Ive had the vermonster, it was awsome. I split it between myself and sIx other guys and it lasted 15 minutes

Jordan on July 13, 2011 at 12:43 am

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