June 21, 2006, - 6:43 am
Speak Loudly and Carry a Toothpick: Rodney Dangerfield America
By
Rodney Dangerfield is back from the grave.
In the late ’70s, America was the globe’s Dangerfield. Like the late comedian, we got no respect.
Well, Rodney Dangerfield America is back. From a hemorrhaging alien problem to bizarre foreign leader loons with nukes, the world is laughing at our impotence, once again.
In the days of Jimmy Carter–whether it was the United Nations, the Middle East, or any other forum–the United States’ most prominent, constant fashion accessory was the “Kick Me” sign on its back. And like most bad fashion trends, that one is making a rude comeback.
In the 1980s, the Reagan Revolution put an end to the world’s snickering. But for a few missteps–like Ronald Reagan pulling out of Beirut shortly after the Hezbollah massacre of hundreds of U.S. Marines and allowing Lebanon to become a Hezbollah stronghold to this day–America regained the respect that Jimmy Carter threw away.
Unfortunately, President Bush is taking far too many cues from the Peanut Farmer President. And precious few from the Great Communicator.
In the ’70s, Carter helped usher out America’s most important ally in the Middle East, the Shah of Iran. The Shah was a tyrannical dictator who denied the human rights of his opponents, was the conventional wisdom of State Department types. But the Shah was a benevolent, pro-U.S. dictator in a strategically important nation.
And in the Shah’s vacuum, “democracy” broke out and Iran got a great democratic humanitarian? Nope. The country got a series of Islamofascist dictators each outdoing the other in crushing human rights and dissent with beatings and torture.
The Khomeini government that followed the Shah was met with a series of tough talk from Jimmy Carter. But tough talk didn’t change the Khomeini government. It didn’t get American hostages released during 444 days in captivity.
And tough talk won’t get Iran to give up its nuclear weapons program, today. The world is laughing at us. Secretary of State Condoleeza Rice convinced President Bush to engage in a policy that’s hardly threatening: Oh, yeah. Well, if you don’t give up your nuclear weapons voluntarily, we’re gonna, we’re gonna, we’re gonna . . . ?!
No wonder Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is shown laughing and smiling in recent photos. Talk like this didn’t stop Hitler and it won’t stop his modern day version. Action will. Action is what Iran–what the Islamic world that hates us–understands and respects.
But we don’t have the will.
Then, there is North Korea. Competing with Ahmadinejad in the over-Viagra-ed department, North Korean leader Kim Jong-Il is test-launching long-range Taepodong-2 missiles capable of reaching the U.S.
So what do we do in response? Secretary Rice warns that the testing of such missiles would be a “provocative act.” Wrong. A Paris Hilton video is a “provocative act.” This is frightening–an act of war, infinitely more serious. Calling it a “provocative act” is not exactly boot-quake inspiring verbiage. It won’t do a thing. It certainly won’t stop North Korea from pursuing its missile practice.
We must shoot their missiles down to show them we mean business. There is no other way.
Ronald Reagan had it right. Peace through strength. Not through pillow talk. The world respected his tough behavior. The world laughs at our current wimpishness.
It’s not just the President and his minions. It’s local leaders, too, who properly elicit plenty of disdain from the world.
Take Minneapolis Mayor R. T. Rybak. The R. T. must stand for “Real Traitor.” You’ve heard of Hanoi Jane. These days, she’s got strong competition from Minneapolis Rybak.
While tens of that the Bush Administration won’t, Rybak is on the side of alien invaders.
He’s ordered Minneapolis police NOT to get involved in cracking down on people in the country illegally.
“Vulnerable people have always needed to see the police as being there to protect and serve, and that can’t happen when the first words out of a cop’s mouth are ‘I need to see your papers,'” Rybak told USA Today.
Federal Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) agents, headed by Special Agent Robert Hines, have trained local police from around the country in how to identify, process and detain illegal aliens. But Rybak not only won’t help ICE or allow his police to participate, last month he demanded that Minneapolis-based ICE agents stop identifying themselves as “police” and asked them to stop wearing vests and jackets with the word.
Unfortunately, Rybak has a lot of company. USA Today reports that Chicago prohibits its police and city workers from asking immigrants their legal status and New York City’s public hospitals promised to keep secret an immigrant’s legal status. Blame Mayor Michael Bloomberg, who–like Rybak–is an opponent of enforcing immigration laws, for that.
While 57 big-city police chiefs in the Major Cities Chiefs Association came out against enforcing immigration laws, our troops in Iraq have a large contingent in Al-Qaim at the Syrian border. They know that insurgents, alien invaders from other countries will slip through, if they’re not there–and throughout Iraq–demanding to see papers. It’s what police all over America should be doing, but won’t.
The world laughs. Thousands of miles away from American terra firma, our troops are tough and brave.
But over here, our politicians and policy makers from top to bottom, national to local, aren’t any of these things.
They speak loudly and carry a toothpick.
Tags: America, Beirut, Bush, Bush administration, Chicago, Chiefs, comedian, Condoleeza Rice, Debbie Schlussel Rodney Dangerfield, Department of State, Hezbollah stronghold, Hitler, Hizballah, impotence, Iraq, Islamic Republic of Iran, Jimmy Carter, Khomeini government, Kim Jong-Il, leader, Lebanon, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Major Cities Chiefs Association, Mayor, Michael Bloomberg, Middle East, Minneapolis, New York City, North Korea, nuclear technology, Paris Hilton, Peanut Farmer President, President, R. T. Rybak, Robert Hines, Rodney Dangerfield, Ronald Reagan, Secretary, Secretary of State, Special Agent, State Department, United Nations, United States, USA Today, usher
Absolutely brilliant. Just pure common sense and plain talk.
Excellent article, Ms. Schlussel.
Jeff_W on June 21, 2006 at 9:01 am